The Two Men She Loves
by skktjj
Summary: Repost. My guess for S.11 for Samka. Steve shows up at Sam's motel demanding Alex goes with him. He becomes violent.Luka shows up and Steve leaves but just as the three head back to Chicago Steve gets his revenge. Some swearing, descriptions and sexuality
1. Airlifted

**_Chapter 1 - Airlifted _**

_Two choppers are bringing injured casualties from a hit and run_.

"Here they come! Now, let's all be careful of the blade. Third time's not the charm!" yelled Dr. Lockhart over the noise of the helicopter.  
  
"What's the bullet Chuck?" asked Chen. Both Abby and Deb noticed his uneasiness.  
  
"You know them," he replied.  
  
The gurney was brought out and Abby recognized Alex. Sam was there bleeding and shaken clinging to her son's hand.  
  
"Ten-year-old male. Head trauma from a hit and run. Possible skull fracture, bleeding from the ears, Bp 90/60, pulse ox at 81%. Twenty six year old female, multiple lacerations, good vitals, she's much calmer now ...she was hysterical when we got there and when you see who's in the second chopper you'll know why. It's ..."  
  
"Luka?" Abby finished Chuck's sentence. "Deb, go with Sam and Alex and tell Susan Luka's on the way!"  
  
"Okay! Come on people let's get this kid to Trauma 1!" shouted Deb.  
  
As the second chopper was landing Abby flashed Chuck a look. He read her thoughts and responded "He's in rough shape. Looks like he got hit straight on!" Abby felt her breath rise and lodge in her chest. She shook her head whispering "_Luka_," 


	2. Get the Girl

**_Chapter 2 - Get the Girl  
_**  
Earlier in the afternoon. 5:45 pm.  
  
Kerry was sitting in the lounge staring out the window when her thoughts were interrupted by Luka who'd come in and flopped on the sofa. He'd showered and changed but he didn't look like he had anywhere to go. He glanced in her direction and said hello.  
  
"How's it going with the custody hearing?" He had a comforting tome in his voice and Kerry could tell he truly cared.  
  
"It's an uphill battle but I'm not giving up," she replied with a sigh.  
  
"You can't give up. He's _YOUR_ son; in spite of what Sandy's family feels. You're a fighter, Kerry. It'll all work out and one day it'll just be a bad memory," he said, supportively.  
  
"How about you? Still no word from her?" Kerry asked.  
  
He quickly averted his eyes to the window and shook his head. Weary from going over in his head what could have prompted her to leave; this was different from the other crosses he'd borne before. There was a concrete reason when he had lost his loved ones the first time ... It was a senseless war. This time, Sam's sudden departure with Alex, confused and alarmed him. She looked terrified and hurt the day she left with Alex screaming in the back seat. It had something to do with Steve but she hadn't made any sense that day and though he tried to stop her; tried to reason with her; it was no use. She didn't seem to trust anyone. Not even him.  
  
"It's killing you, isn't it? ... Not knowing where they are?"  
  
"Yeah. I miss them," He sighed and walked over to the window and stared onto the street below. Every time he looked out he saw couples, walking arm in arm; families together. Every day since she left, it seemed like he treated patients with wives, husbands, mothers, fathers, grandparents. Not a single bachelor, homeless person. Everyone he treated had someone to go home to; someone to care about and someone to care about them. He had that with Sam and Alex up until they left 2 weeks before.  
  
"You know, Kerry, all I want is to be happy. You know how I was before I left for Africa. With all that happened there, I decided that I'd been given another chance at life just so that I could work and help others. What other reason was there? I was still alone. But they took me away from that ... Made me happy. I love both of them and now here I am, alone with no idea of where they are or what's happened to them. She took off and I have no idea what the hell I did,"  
  
"You didn't do anything, Luka. I think Sam's done this before. She's a runner," Kerry said, matter-of –factly.  
  
"Yeah, but did she run away with his jack-ass father this time?" he said with a sigh, running his hands through his hair. "I just wish I knew,"  
  
"You've been here everyday working since they've been gone," Looking at her roster she confirmed her statement. "Yep. Says here, fifteen days consistently. You're waiting for her to walk through those doors and she hasn't. Go home. Maybe she'll call,"  
  
"I've been home and everywhere in Chicago and I have no idea where she could be,"  
  
"Take some time off. Go look for her if you have to. You need a break from here and from what you're going through. It'll do you good to go away for a couple weeks ... Clear your head,"  
  
"I can't get them out of my head. What makes you think I won't think of them while I'm alone for two weeks?"  
  
"You're taking two weeks off, Luka. I can't afford for you not to. Carter's back tomorrow and we'll be fine until you return,"  
  
"I don't know Kerry I ..." He was interrupted by a knock on the door.  
  
"Dr. Kovac, there's a call for you. Line three. Umm ... I think its Sam,"  
  
"Thanks Jerry," He glanced at Kerry hopefully. She nodded and left the room.  
  
"Kovac," he answered.  
  
"Hey, it's me,"  
  
"Sam, thank God! Are you guys alright?" he asked.  
  
"We're fine..."  
  
"Where are you?"  
  
"Luka, just listen, okay?" He heard her sigh. I just wanted to let you know, we're on our way back. We're just outside Chicago,"  
  
"Sam, what happened? Did you leave because of something I did?"  
  
"God, no. I didn't leave because of you," she said. "I didn't leave you. It's Steve,"  
  
"You're with him?" he asked, dejectedly.  
  
"No, I'm trying ... was trying, to get away from him – _AS USUSAL_. He follows us around and when he catches up to us he tries to crawl back into our lives. He fills Alex's head with all these stupid ideas and makes our lives impossible. Usually, he disappears but he's found us now and I just decided it would just be safer if I came back,"  
  
"I wish you told me this sooner. You could have stayed with me and we could have worked this out together,"  
  
"I know that now. I'm sorry I hurt you... again,"  
  
"I was more worried than hurt. When are you back?"  
  
"I was going to head this afternoon but I have to get my car fixed ... some idiot rammed it in the parking lot and the back bumper's detached. If I can get it fixed in the morning I'll be back in the city by noon,"  
  
Listen, I've got two weeks off and I was going to use them to look for you anyway. I'll come to you tonight. We'll stay the night in your room then we'll take care of your car in the morning. Give me the address of your motel," he said. He sounded and felt more in control but mostly he was grateful that he was getting them back. Sam smiled with relief on the other end of the phone and gave him the address.  
  
"Okay, that's about an hour or so away so with the traffic getting out of the city, I should be there in ....oh, two hours? ... So close to eight,"  
  
"Thanks. Sorry I ... I'm just sorry that ..."  
  
"You confuse me? ... _Every single day_?" he finished her sentence with a chuckle.  
  
"That's not how the line goes," she teased.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"You know - the famous line from Jerry McGuire?"  
  
"Jerry McGuire?"  
  
"Never mind. We'll rent it one of these days," she laughed.  
  
"See you at eight," he said.  
  
"I'll be waiting," She hung up and breathed a sigh of relief. Finally, things were going to be alright.  
  
Luka rushed out to the admitting desk and told Kerry that he would be back with Sam the next day. Everyone was pleased to see his boyish grin again.  
  
"Okay, I know enough, now get outta here!" yelled Kerry. She watched the tall, young man, who was too old for his years, rush out towards his car and she smiled. Perhaps if happiness finally found him, it could find her and re-unite her with little Henry. 


	3. Twice the Trauma

**_Chapter 3 – Twice the Trauma_**  
  
_Back at County General, Sam, Alex and Luka have been brought into the ER. There is a tense hush in the halls as some staff stare through the panes of the doors to the trauma room where Luka is being worked on. A few hover around the room with Sam and Alex and everywhere else, the rest of the staff try to continue working, hoping and praying for them to survive._  
  
"On my count ... one, two, three! Okay, get a couple large bore IV's going ... ah ...18 gauge. I want a blood gas ... four units of O neg, portable CT and ultrasound. Get him on a controlled vent ... Luka? Luka? Luka, it's Susan. You're in the ER. You were in an accident and we're taking care of you so stay with us, okay? Luka? ... "  
  
"He's stirring Dr, Lewis," Conni sounded hopeful as she watched Luka respond to pain.  
  
"God, he's bleeding everywhere ... Lily, order 2 more units of O neg; type and cross matched. He needs a massive transfusion so make sure we have 1 to 2 units of frozen plasma for every five units of blood," said Susan. "Keep checking for a response, Conni and Shelly, give him 10mg of morphine, IV push. Neela, what about his resps?" she asked, taking a look at his abdomen.  
  
"Diminished breath sounds on the right, Dr Lewis" Neela replied.  
  
"Lung's collapsed. Alright ...Someone, I need a thoracotomy tray. Abby, what've you got?"  
  
"Open fracture of the right tibia among other things. I'm trying to clamp a posterior tibial hemorrhage,"  
  
"You okay with that?" asked Susan.  
  
Abby swallowed hard and continued to work on the bleeder with shaky hands.  
  
"Abby?" Susan asked again.  
  
"Dr. Lockhart?" Shelly looked at her with concern.  
  
"Ah, yeah Susan,"  
  
Abby felt a hand lightly touch her shoulder. "Are you alright, Dr. Lockhart?"  
  
"I'm good Shelly. I'm alright," Stopping for a second she took a breath, steadied her nerves and attempted once more. This was harder than she'd ever imagined. Her hands were in his leg squeezing an artery. It was supposed to be just a leg but this was her friend, Luka. At one time her Luka and now here he was lying before her as she and the people who helped him save lives everyday were trying to save his.  
  
"Okay ... I've just ... about .. got it," said Abby, quietly. She quickly tried to glance at his face. She could barely see it. His head and neck were immobilized and the tube and hose from the ventilator hid his mouth and chin. "Hang in there, Luka," she thought, wondering if he felt any pain. Susan ordered some morphine but with the amount of injuries he'd sustained Abby was certain no amount of painkillers would be enough. Gently touching his hand, she tried to smile but she could feel the tears stinging her eyes. She snapped her mind back to the task at hand and proceeded to treat Luka's multiple fractures while Susan worked on stabilizing his respiration.  
  
"Okay, let's see what I can do for this lung. Come on, come on, come on ... got it! There we go," Susan waited to see if and how well the blood was draining from his lungs. In a few seconds she was pleased with what she had seen then asked "Sound better now, Neela?"  
  
"Yes, Dr. Lewis,"  
  
"And his pulse?" asked Susan.  
  
"Pulse 60, BP's dropped 80/50, heart rate 140, sats at 80%," said Conni. Not great news. Susan examined Luka's abdomen. It was rigid and purple. The ultrasound and the results of the DPL confirmed her worst suspicions.  
  
"Shit, I've gotta go in. Lydia get me a 10 blade and suction,"  
  
She made her incision and put the spreader in place.  
  
"God, what a mess," Susan was barely audible, not wanting to risk Luka overhearing her. "_How fast was that car going_?"  
  
"Dr. Lewis, he's crashing!" said Neela. "Vitals are deteriorating. BP's 70/34 and falling! ... He's out!"  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------  
  
_In the other trauma room Dr. Chen, Cooper, Malik and Chuney were working on Alex.  
_  
"Okay, Listen up. Malik, establish IV access and administer oxygen. Someone monitor, and administer IV crystalloids; I want to keep the SBP greater than 90 mms,"  
  
"Turn him; he's vomiting," called out Cooper. "He's coming around. Hey, Alex? Alex? Do you know where you are?" Alex's eyes darted about the room.  
  
"Mm ... ow ...ah ... mm ... mom ...," he sobbed.  
  
"I'm right here, hon," Sam rushed to his side to comfort him. Alex's blinked several times rapidly but he could not see. "Mm .. mom, I ... can't see, ... can't see," Sam clutched his hand.  
  
"I'm right here kiddo. You've hurt your head and it's really hard for you to see right now but it'll get better once the doctors take care of you. I promise," Sam looked anxiously at Dr. Chen as she examined his eyes.  
  
"Pupils are responding to light. I suspect hematoma and once the fluid is drained and it'll relieve the pressure on the optic nerve," she said. "Are his vitals still stable?" Someone confirmed that they were and Deb was relieved. Sam looked worried enough as it was. She refused treatment anxiously awaiting the outcome of her son and Luka.  
  
"Here are the CT and his labs Dr. Chen," said Chuney, rushing into the room. Alex's scan confirmed Dr. Chen's suspicions and he did have an epidural hematoma.  
  
"Good, spine's cleared. Chuney, elevate his head 30 degrees. I'd like to increase venous drainage,"  
  
There was a collection of blood over a cerebral hemisphere and he was being sent up to the OR to have a surgeon perform a burr hole to relieve the pressure. Alex's lab's showed a marked drop in his blood sugar which concerned Dr. Chen.  
  
"Okay, they're ready for him upstairs," Malik said.  
  
"Alex, you're going to the OR now and they are going to help you feel better," Sam told him.  
  
"Op .. per ... ra ... "  
  
"Yeah. You have to have an operation so that you can see again and fix that broken head of yours ... there's a lot of gross stuff they've gotta clear out of there so you can get better,"  
  
"S ..scared ... Head ... hurts ... His speech was slurring a little and Sam knew he was going unconscious.  
  
"I'm coming with you and I'll be there when you wake up, okay?"  
  
"Lu... Luk ... hurt?"  
  
"Don't worry. Luka's going to be fine. Now you just relax. I'm right here,"  
  
"Sam, he should go now," Deb's heart went out to Sam. The two people she loved were critically injured; one teetering on death's door.  
  
"He's good to go. Malik, make sure they see his labs regarding his blood sugar," Turning to Sam she said, "I think he's going to be okay. His cervical spine evaluation shows no injury to his neck. He's a strong kid, Sam. He should rebound fast. He was lucky Luka was there tonight. Might have been much worse," Deb tried to be as re-assuring as she could but Sam was still worried about her son and torn to leave Luka behind.  
  
"I ... um ... I'm going with Alex ... Are you going to Luka now?" she asked, meekly. She pointed to the trauma room where Luka lay motionless among all the bodies moving about him as they tried to save his life.  
  
"Yeah, Susan needs my help. He's one of us, Sam. We're not going to quit on him," Seeing the activity level in the adjacent room increase, Deb decided that this was a good time to get Sam out of the room. "Go on now, Sam. We'll take care of Luka. Go on with Alex,"  
  
Sam left with Alex, Malik and Cooper and Deb burst into the room next door. Alarms were going off like crazy. Luka was in v-tach and Susan was about to shock him. It was eerie watching his body lurch upward and thud onto the gurney.  
  
"Okay, charge to 200! Clear!"  
  
"No change, Susan," said Abby.  
  
"Give me 300! Come on Luka, we don't have time for this shit now, you're bleeding everywhere! Clear!"  
  
"Okay, give him the Epi! ..... Come onnn! ........ Charge to 360! ...... Clear! ... Shit! .... Okay, 1.5 of Lidocaine IV push! ......Okay, this is the one. 360 ... Clear!"  
  
"Normal sinus rhythm," said Conni calmly. There was a sense of temporary relief in the room.  
  
"Alright, deep breath everybody. Let's see if we can fix these bleeders,"  
  
"What can I do?" asked Deb.  
  
"Abby, what's up with the fractures and the lacs?"  
  
"I've controlled the tibial bleeder and I suspect a femur fracture as well. He needs to go to x-ray; there're too many other fractures that need to be assessed," she replied.  
  
"He's not going to make it there if we can't stop this bleeding. Deb, I need help clamping this bleeder in the small intestine," The two women worked diligently on their colleague and got the bleeder under control.  
  
"Where's the rest of the blood's coming from?" Deb asked, a little shocked at the sight.  
  
"Did a lavage and the ultrasound showed a liver laceration and ruptured spleen. Ribs 11 and 12 and 5 on the left and 7 and 9 on the right are the culprits. There's kidney trauma on the right and there's a bleeder somewhere near there I'd like to find,"  
  
"I just sent Alex to the OR and Malik said they were minutes away from wheeling out a GSW up there so let's do it so he has a chance to make it up there," said Deb. The two women carefully searched the flank area then Deb found it.  
  
"There it is. It's the renal vein. As long as his vitals hold steady we can do this," she said confidently. She and Susan were able to clamp off the bleeder so that they could get him up to surgery where they could do the rest.  
  
Dr. Corday came into the room to be briefed. As Susan spoke she quickly looked over what they had done.  
  
"Great work, you three. Your team has given him a chance. Abby, I'll speak to Ortho about the remaining fractures. They'd want to know what you gave him for anti-infectants,"  
  
"Cephalothan. I put it on the chart,"  
  
"Great. It's me, Anspaugh and Dean and Robinson. Wish us luck. Who's coming up?" Elizabeth looked at Abby who quickly looked away. She wasn't sure if she could handle watching if something went wrong. She put her hand to her forehead then it dropped to her mouth as she began to sob.  
  
"Abby, stay with Susan. I'll go and I'll keep you posted," said Deb.  
  
Neela, Lydia, Connie and the rest of the team slumped on the chairs and against the walls. Abby and Susan ripped off their gloves and embraced.  
  
"You did well with the bleeders Susan. He was lucky to have had you and Deb in the room,"  
  
"Well, we did what we could. We just have to hope now. What did the secondary show?"  
  
"More like what it didn't," replied Abby. "Ahh... Suspected fracture right femur; dislocated right knee and I guess the truck hit him on the right and he landed on his left because the humerus and the radius on the right are broken and so's the collar bone. He's a wreck,"  
  
"And head trauma?" asked Susan  
  
"Oh, that's the good news. The portable showed indications of a small, simple fracture which didn't surprise me," Abby said drying her eyes.  
  
"Why?" asked Susan  
  
"Well, he managed to break everything else, but like on our first date, when the mugger hit him over the head with a pipe, his head's fine. Luka has the hardest head, I swear," she said as they laughed between the tears.   
  
"Man, there was a lot of damage. He landed hard and he's a big guy. Surgery's going to be long. God! I feel like I'm having a nightmare. I still can't believe tonight!" said Susan.  
  
"I'd like to know what the _fuck_ really happened to them," muttered Abby. He was going to meet them and bring them back after she'd been gone what? ... Two weeks? No phone call, no explanation. She just up and leaves her job and Luka behind without warning and when she finally gets in touch with him he drops everything only to get run over by a truck ... and Alex too? And what's with her cuts and bruises? Was she hit too?"  
  
"Don't think so. It looks like she was attacked,"  
  
"It's just one big fucking mess and Luka got caught up in it. I just hope he ... you know ... that Elizabeth and Anspaugh could ..." Abby couldn't finish the sentence. Susan hugged her again.  
  
"I know Abby, I'm hoping for the same thing,"  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------  
  
The rest of the night was eerily slow and the staff anxiously awaited news on Luka and Alex. The elevators opened and never sounded louder. It was Deb. She had come down from the OR and her expression was grim.  
  
"Deb? What's happening up there?" asked Abby  
  
"Alex is out of surgery. It went well and they're just waiting for him to regain consciousness,"  
  
"And Luka?" asked Susan.  
  
"He's ah ... It's not good. He had some complications. His heart stopped but they got him back and they still have at least 4 more hours to go. Everyone there's hoping he hangs on until they're through. Sam's a wreck. She's with Alex then she runs back to the OR to check on Luka ... I finally convinced her to just sit with Alex and that someone will tell her if anything happens with Luka. I thought I could sit through the rest of the surgery but ... I couldn't stay. After they got back a sinus rhythm I just had to get out of there ... It was just ... It's Luka, you know. It's hard to watch them almost lose him like that ... I couldn't stay,"  
  
"He's one of us Deb. It is hard to watch. You feel so helpless,"  
  
Their conversation was interrupted by elevator doors opening up again. A puffy eyed Sam approached the desk.  
  
"They said it was no use for me to wait around. That ... I should ah ... get fixed up before the cuts get infected,"  
  
"I'll help you," Abby sounded cold and Susan stood there watching her walk away with Sam, wondering just what Abby was going to say. So quietly, she followed them. In the suture room Abby wasted no time letting Sam know her feelings.  
  
"What happened tonight Sam?" asked Abby.  
  
"They were hit by a truck," replied Sam sullenly, as she put on a gown so Abby could clean her wounds.  
  
"Just _some_ truck?"  
  
"Why the inquisition? I already gave my statement to the police. I don't need to explain anything to you,"  
  
"Yes you do! My friend is brought in here crushed by a truck, bleeding to death and _who's with him? _The woman whom he thought cared for him comes in sliced up and her kid is strapped to a back board! It wasn't just some truck, Sam! _What really happened_?"  
  
"_Abby_!" Susan interrupted "I'm going to take care of Sam,"  
  
"No, I can do it!" Abby snapped back.  
  
"I said I'm doing it. Now go check on your patient Mr. Lassater in curtain 6,"  
  
Abby flashed Susan a glare and stormed out. Susan pulled up a chair in front of Sam and began cleaning her cuts and bruises.  
  
"You've clotted nicely, I'm just going to use butterfly bandages for all of these except this one on your forearm," Susan said calmly as Sam nodded and wiped her tears.  
  
"They're just friends, you know ... Good friends. In fact, we all are and we're just worried about him. He was badly injured and he's very sick. If we have to call his family we're going to need to know what to tell them,"  
  
"I know. It's .... It's my fault you know,"  
  
"Why do you say that?"  
  
"Because I'm an idiot! I should have just come clean and told him the truth about Steve instead of running again,"  
  
"Steve?" asked Susan puzzled.  
  
"My ex. Alex's father. He tracks us down everywhere we go and sticks around for about a week or so then takes off for months ... sometimes for a whole year and I'd had enough this time; so we took off, ah-gain when he unexpectedly showed up where we were staying. I realized then he was following us. I should have just stayed here. Alex was a complete pain in the ass the whole time I was gone because Steve filled his head with all sorts of crazy ideas and empty promises. So, I decided to head back. At least here, I thought I could beg Weaver to hire me again, save up some money and get a restraining order, go to court ... Whatever I needed to do,"  
  
"But it didn't work out that way," said Susan.  
  
"Ouch,"  
  
"Sorry," said Susan. "This really stings,"  
  
"No, it didn't. I called Luka to apologize for freaking out and just taking off like that, especially since he felt it was because of something he did," explained Sam.  
  
"You really hurt him, Sam. He was stunned, hurt and really sad. He worked every day for two weeks straight hoping you'd just show up," Susan said, trying not to sound like she was scolding her.  
  
"I know and I'm not proud of that. I called him and we had this great talk and I told him I was going to get my car fixed and drive back tomorrow but he told me he'd come get us. He wasn't even angry. He just wanted us back,"  
  
"What happened then?"  
  
"When he showed up, Steve was in our motel room and he was trying to make us go with him. Alex was willing until Steve lost his nerve and took out this knife and threatened to hurt us. Luka came in behind him and Steve grabbed me and started cutting me. Then Luka just walked up to him, hit the knife out of his hand and pummeled him. Alex starts screaming and yelling so Luka stops and Steve took off,"  
  
"That sounds like Luka," Susan sighed with a nod.  
  
"He checks on me and gets me some towels for my arm and then he starts taking our stuff to his car. After he was gone, Alex decides to bolt and I yelled to Luka to grab him because I didn't want him to do anything dumb, like following Steve. I ran out to the balcony to see if Luka got him and that's when Steve drove his truck directly towards them. I think he was aiming for Luka but when he picked up Alex in the headlights he swerved. Luka threw Alex out of the way and Steve hit him. He went flying into this wooden fence; went straight through it. We were up a bit above the main entrance and he landed on the driveway below. He fell about 15 feet. I rushed down there, got to Alex, got to Luka, ran to the pay phone and called it in and told them what happened and that we needed an airlift to County. Now I'm here, waiting,"  
  
"You're not alone. We're all waiting with you. Whatever happens, you're not alone,"  
  
"The two men I love are unconscious upstairs and if I loose them ...I just don't know ..."  
  
"You know what; I don't think that'll happen. Alex is going to be fine and Luka is a survivor and I _know_ you know what I mean. He was supposed to be dead a few times and I'm not talking just about the war or the Congo. Maybe he survived all that he did to be with you and Alex. Think about that,"  
  
"You know,Dr. Lewis, you're alright,"  
  
"Susan ... and yeah, I am," giggled Susan. "Abby is too. She's close to Luka and she's scared, just like all of us,"  
  
"Yeah. Well, I'd better head back.... See if Alex is awake; check up on Luka,"  
  
"I'll come up later to see them,"  
  
Sam left and Susan exhaled forcefully, wondering what the early morning hours would bring.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------ 


	4. After Twelve Hours

_**Chapter 4 - After Twelve Hours**_

_Alex is still in a serious condition but is at least conscious and holding his own but Luka's injuries are extensive and severe and have caused complications and he might die. Abby joins her and is sorry for what happened earlier between them_.  
  
It was 10:15 am; twelve hours since Sam, Alex and Luka were airlifted to County. Luka was in surgery for almost nine hours. There were setbacks in the OR but the team kept addressing them one after another and, by a miracle, he survived surgery.  
  
Elizabeth Corday slumped into the armchair in the surgeons lounge. She dragged the cap from her head and wiped the tears that she allowed to flowfrom her eyes, now that it was all over. She reflected on the last nine unbelievable hours. Luka had arrested just as she had finished repairing his liver.  
  
"What's going on Henry?"  
  
"V-fib!" he shouted.  
  
"Okay, paddles ... charge 200! ... clear! Alright push the Epi!" For 10 minutes they shocked his heart, and he had been pumped with Epi and Lidocane. Once he had been stabilized, they continued to repair his body. But extreme blood loss dropped his blood pressure and once again they had to stop their procedures to work on his vitals.  
  
"Dr. Anspaugh, his blood pressure is falling fast," said the anesthetist.  
  
"Dr. Dean, you might have some blood pooling somewhere in that leg," he suggested to his colleague.  
  
"Christ, not just some, a lot! Here under the skin,"  
  
"Well, come on let's find where it's coming from!" she had said.  
  
She remembered the alarms going off yet again, indicating his heart had arrested once more. The aura of the OR was frantic. Elizabeth's eye briefly caught Deb Chen's pained expression as she stood in the observation area. She had been in disbelief. As she sat in the armchair, she tried to make sense of the past events. He was fine yesterday. Walking around doing his job and in just hours, it all changed. She rubbed her eyes and tried to get the images out of her head. Images of Luka, mere hours ago, nearly dying on an operating table in the hospital where he worked.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---  
  
The consulting neurosurgeon spoke with Sam about Alex's condition.

"We intubated him using RSI and we pre-medicated him with lidocaine, etomidate and a neuromuscular blockade. We're using mannitol with him now to help reduce inter-cranial pressure and blood viscosity because we want to increase blood flow and oxygen delivery to his brain,"

"Are there any side effects to the mannitol? It's just that he's diabetic ... and ... I worry ...,"

"Don't," the doctor re-assured her. "We used mannitol and we administer it according to his weight. It's safer to use on diabetics than phenytoin that has been known to raise blood sugar levels. But, as with any drug, we'll monitor him for any pulmonary congestion, or dehydration, fever or intracranial bleeding. He's in good hands up here and Alex's recovery looks very promising,"

"Thank you, Dr. Stewart,"

"Just have me paged if you have any questions and try and get some rest. I've heard you're pulling double duty up here,"

"I'll try. Thanks," said Sam and she looked at her son who was still asleep with a tube down his throat and all sorts of electrodes and wires leading from his bandaged head. At least everyone was hopeful about Alex. It was different for the man who saved his life. The doctors felt Luka was more likely to die of his injuries. Powerless. Helpless. Afraid. She had felt these before but not with such overwhelming intensity. If Luka died, it would burden her forever. She was so grateful to him yet he might never be able to hear her express her feelings to him. It would just be she and her son. Alone – as they had always been.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alex started showing signs of consciousness around noon. His eyelids fluttered at first, and then he moved his fingers and turned his head a bit. He drifted in and out of sleep, happy to see his mom at his side.  
  
"Hey, kiddo? ... You're feeling pretty rough, huh? You banged your head pretty hard last night. Do you remember what happened?"  
  
Alex blinked and a tear rolled down his cheek. He reached for her hand. He managed a little smile but then looked worried again. He tried to whisper something but Sam gently explained that he shouldn't try to talk because he had a tube down his throat to help him breathe. The boy blinked several times and Sam realized that his vision, though returned, was still blurry.  
  
"I know you're in a lot of pain sweetie, and everything is blurry but you're going to be fine and you'll be able to see again in no time. I'll be right here with you, so I want you to go back to sleep now. You need to rest so that you can get better real fast, okay?" Alex continued to blink to clear his vision but soon the simple task became too difficult and his eyelids grew heavy. Sam watch as he drifted off, thankful that he was still with her and was going to fully recover.  
  
"How's he doing?" said a voice as a hand gently rested on Sam's shoulder. It was Abby.  
  
"He's waking up slowly. There's been quite a bit of movement. He recognizes me. So far so good,"  
  
"He's going to be fine. How are you?" Abby said, pointing to Sam's arms. Sam said they felt better and Abby turned to face her.  
  
"Listen, Sam, I want to apologize for my behavior earlier. I had no right and I'm sorry. I know none of this was your fault and you were trying to protect Alex,"  
  
"Hey, no worries. I know you and Luka are good friends. You can't shut out someone like him ... he's a good guy. I mean, look at what he's done for me. He came to get us and he saved Alex's life," sniffed Sam. Abby put an arm around her.  
  
"So here's what's going to happen. Luka's in recovery and Kerry has made arrangements for him to take up that parking space right over there," Abby pointed the next room over through the glass window. "That way, if you're here with Alex you can see Luka and if Alex is asleep you could sit at Luka's bedside,"  
  
"I don't know what to say," said Sam, wiping her tears.  
  
"Don't say a word. We wouldn't have it any other way. Now, they're bringing Luka in about half an hour so go grab something to eat, a coffee, splash some water on your face and I'll sit with Alex,"  
  
Sam hugged Abby. She rose to leave then said, "You know, we've got no family here and neither does Luka. It's nice to have people like you around,"  
  
"You do have family Sam and not just us. Luka's your family and you and Alex are his," replied Abby.  
  
Sam wiped her tears and smiled and headed for the ladies room.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
In recovery, Elizabeth checked on Luka. He showed some brief signs of waking; opening his eyes for about a minute but seemed too fatigued to try again. Though she was happy he was stable, Elizabeth was concerned. He certainly could have died right there on the table on two occasions. Elizabeth didn't know how much fight he had left in him. His lost a great deal of blood and was physically depleted.  
  
"Dr. Corday, we'd like to move Dr. Kovac to the ICU now," said the OR nurse.  
  
"He's good to go to, Debbie, thank you," Elizabeth took Luka's right hand firmly in hers and accompanied him all the way to intensive care. In his condition she felt it was vital for him to feel the presence of someone who cared about him. As they made their way down, all the memories of Mark's illness that cut short their time together came flooding back. She felt the tears well up in her eyes and she quickly blinked and wiped them away. "No", she thought, "I mustn't let Sam see me like this. She has to stay strong to help him pull through this ordeal,"  
  
The elevators opened and Elizabeth pulled herself together. As Luka was wheeled into the ICU a hush came over Sam, Abby, Susan and Kerry who were waiting there. They had seen patients in this state a hundred times before but this was Luka and it was hard to watch him connected to all the machines with all IV bags, the bags of blood and tubes and wires taped all over his body. Elizabeth examined Luka again; spoke briefly with Kerry before turning to Sam. Kerry went over to the ICU nursing station to deal with some paperwork while Susan went for a coffee and Abby sat with Alex's until Elizabeth and Sam were through.  
  
"He woke up for a bit in recovery but he's very weak and I'm concerned recovery's going to be an uphill struggle for him. I thought you'd like to see the chart," said Elizabeth, "But I'm going to go through his injuries and what we've done to repair the damage,"  
  
Sam gulped as she heard about Luka's condition. Steve had crushed Luka with the impact of the truck. His right leg was broken in two places. He had a compound tib/fib fracture that caused posterior tibial hemorrhage, a clean, closed, transverse fracture of the femur, an impacted fracture of the left humerus and a comminuted fracture of the left radius with a greenstick fracture of the left clavicle. He had five broken ribs; one had lacerated his liver, one had collapsed his lung, one had made a small puncture in his small intestine and one had ruptured his spleen and the other had punctured his right renal vein.  
  
"Sam, we nearly lost him twice in surgery. His heart stopped and his blood pressure fell dangerously low. I repaired his liver and removed his spleen and managed to control all the bleeders,"

"What are your gut feelings?" asked Sam, tearfully. "I'd like you to tell me he's going to ... to live ... but I know how weak he is and the seriousness of his condition,"

"And I have to be honest, Sam. I'm surprised and very grateful he made it out of surgery alive. I'm worried now about pneumonia, and infection and of course, his level of consciousness,"

"I know, he needs to wake up," Sam sighed and dried her eyes. "But ... Dr. Corday ... do you think he can survive this? Or ... Or will he ... die?"

"The odds he was given after we closed were 70:30 that he won't make it to morning but we haven't given up hope, Sam. We haven't given up on him and you mustn't either. He needs your strength and support to survive," Thank you, Dr. Corday . I'm not going to give up on him but I'm glad you were honest with me. I needed to get everything straight before I called his family,"  
  
Sam glanced over the pages of the chart then put it down and walked to the head of the bed. She gently stroked his cheek. Luka did not respond. She had never imagined he could be that pale. His face was bruised and cut, a huge bandage covering the gash that stretched from his forehead to his temple. His left arm was in a cast and his right leg in a rigid splint. Sam shuddered when she saw long the stitched incisions on his leg. Dr. Corday explained that because of the massive injuries to his leg, Luka might need another operation. Sam was concerned about the use of his left arm but no nerve or muscle damage was indicated and they expected it to heal well. Sam fixed her gaze on him again. Luka's torso was bandaged and he was still intubated. Dr. Corday had recommended that he should be kept on the ventilator indefinitely because of his depleted physical state.  
  
"Sam, if you need anything or have any questions ..."said Elizabeth sympathetically.  
  
"Yes, I know. I appreciate what you've done for him Dr. Corday,"

Susan returned and joined Abby in Alex's room.  
  
"Hey,"  
  
"Hey, Susan," Abby was flipping through Alex's chart. "He's doing well,"  
  
"Yeah, looks good," said Susan, looking at the chart over Abby's shoulder. "I wish I could say the same for Luka,"  
  
"Why? What do you know?" Abby's voice was shaky.  
  
"I spoke to Elizabeth up in recovery earlier on this morning. Luka's unresponsive. He's so weak she's afraid he could slip into a coma. She's also worried about infection and pneumonia,"  
  
"Shit!" Abby mumbled.  
  
"She's worked him up on drugs and they're gonna watch him like a hawk. He's in good hands," she squeezed Abby on the shoulder and tried to re-assure her. "Look, I'm here with kiddo. Go in there and say hello. The more voices he hears the more comforting and encouraging it would be for him,"  
  
Abby made her way to Luka's bedside.  
  
"Strange isn't it? We deal with this everyday but they're all strangers. When it's someone you know it all seems so unbelievable," Sam whispered. "Now I've got to call his father and tell him what's happened. Damnit. This shouldn't have happened,"

Abby reached out her hand as she took her place beside Sam. Sam took it. There they were, his past lover and his present gazing at him in disbelief, holding on to each other praying for his survival.


	5. Please Wake Up

**_Chapter 5 - Please Wake Up_**  
  
By the end of the week, it had become brief routine conversation. "How are they?" and "Any news?" were the questions asked. The news about Alex encouraged smiles but news about Dr. Kovac made people shake their heads with concern. It seemed Alex was doing better every day and Luka was slowly slipping away.  
  
He walked into the room and saw Sam hunched over the bed holding Luka's hand. She was asleep. In the other room the nurses was checking on Alex who was also sleeping. John quietly removed the chart at the foot of Luka's bed and studied it. Luka only regained partial consciousness twice since his surgery and was comatose.  
  
He carefully stepped closer to him. John didn't like what he saw. Luka's face was grey and he was still on the ventilator. His leg seemed to be healing, though. Carter felt for a distal pulse. "Good," he thought it was somewhat strong and the swelling and the incision on his leg was not as bad as he thought it would have looked.  
  
He checked under the bandage on Luka's forehead. He was shocked to see the length of the gash. It was closed with 22 stitches but it too looked good.  
  
"Buddy, you need to wake up. If you could survive 3 weeks in the Congo with Malaria with no meds, no food and very little water you can wake up now," he whispered and put his hand on Luka's shoulder. He replaced the chart and was about to leave when Sam stirred.  
  
"Dr. Carter?" said Sam rubbing her eyes.  
  
"Hey Sam. And please, call me John or Carter like everyone else. How are you doing?"  
  
"I'm not so sure. Everything is still so unreal to me,"  
  
"I hear Alex is doing well. I was just about to have a peek at his chart,"  
  
"The doctors expect him to make a full recovery," she said with a smile.  
  
"Luka's injuries are healing well," Carter tried to sound optimistic.  
  
"Yeah, they are but you saw the chart ... he needs to wake up," she said dismally.  
  
Carter drew closer and hugged her. Sam burst into tears.  
  
"I don't want to lose him! ... I can't!" she sobbed.  
  
"You won't. We won't let that happen. He'll wake up. Keep talking to him. Everyone's going to come up and bug him so he has to wake up if he wants to get rid of us," He could see that Sam didn't feel any more confident by his comment.  
  
"Look Sam, he was hit head on by 4x4 and he's still here. He was in the Congo for 3 weeks with Malaria and he'd been in a war. He's still here. He's been mugged and he totaled his car. Still here. I don't think we can get rid of him so easily. He's very tough,"  
  
"What if this is the last time? What if this is _too much_?"  
  
"This isn't too much. He lost his family. I think that was the worst one. Now he's got you and Alex and you're going to help him get better," Carter glanced at Luka. "He was hit hard. He's badly injured and it's going to be a hard fight for him. It's only been a week. He hasn't gotten any worse,"  
  
"He needs to get better,"  
  
"Yeah, he does. And, he might have complications but we'll deal with that if it happens and he'll get through it,"  
  
"You sound so sure," sniffed Sam.  
  
"I am," Carter smiled and shook his head. "We weren't the best of friends, you know. But ... all that changed in Africa. When my grandmother died ..." Carter sighed. "I was having a hard time after she died. I needed to do something different with my life but I didn't know what I could do. Luka picked up on my vibe and knowing things were iffy with Abby ... one day he just simply said I should go with him to Africa; do some good. I eventually joined him and I wasn't so sure what I'd gained from going there other than fear ... having a gun to my head and all. Anyways, when I heard that Luka was dead, I went back without a thought. Africa changed our relationship ... opened my eyes. He was my friend and I was going to bring his body back for a decent burial if it was the last thing I did. Then by some miracle his life was spared and I found him. He wasn't supposed to die then and he's not supposed to die now. Gotta have faith Sam. You and Alex mean the world to him. Help him get better," He gave her shoulders a squeeze. "I've gotta go. I'm going to check on Alex and I'll see you later, okay?"  
  
Sam nodded and looked at Luka. He hadn't moved in days. It didn't seem like he was improving, but Carter was right. It certainly wasn't the worst thing that had happened to him.  
  
"Luka? Hon? I hope you can hear me. Thanks for saving Alex and me. But you have to do one more thing for us. You have to wake up. You need to fight this, okay? I'm here and I want you back. I miss looking at those big blue eyes so come on, wake up okay?"  
  
Luka didn't open his eyes but he had heard what she had said. 


	6. The Truth Is

**_Chapter 6 – The Truth is ...  
_**  
She remembered it was the most uncomfortable phone call she had ever made. Sam remembered putting the receiver down, her hand still shaking. She had spoken to Luka's brother Davor and had explained to him that Luka had been hit by a drunk driver. As slowly and gently as she could, she informed him of Luka's injuries and the severity of his condition. Davor, took it well and was calm on the phone. Perhaps he seemed calm because he was trying to understand what she was saying in English. Perhaps he was calm because he didn't know the details. She hadn't told him that she knew the drunk driver. She hadn't told him that it was her ex-boyfriend who rammed a truck into his brother with the intent to kill him. She couldn't say any of that. She didn't need to. Not then and she wasn't sure if she was going to talk about it now. The family did have a right to know but for now, didn't they just need to be with him as she was; hoping for a miracle; praying for him to recover; willing him to live?  
  
Sam had no idea whom to expect. All she knew was that her conversation ended with Davor saying someone will be in Chicago soon. Whomever it was would be here today and they would meet her in Luka's room. They would probably only be able to do what she did every day – stare in disbelief at Luka as he lay comatose, oblivious to the world.  
  
She sat at Luka's bedside his hand in hers. She hoped for something. Anything. A twitch; a blink; a squeeze of her hand. But as usual there was nothing.  
  
"Luka, your family is coming to see you today. You have to wake up, hon. You can't scare them like this. I know you're in a lot of pain, but be brave and open your eyes. Please. For me? For Alex? For them? Come on hon. We all need you to get better. So come on ... open your eyes,"  
  
"Ah, excuse me, Samantha?" A very familiar husky voice spoke. Sam turned to see another Luka standing in the doorway with a gorgeous woman at his side.  
  
"Yes, I'm Samantha," she said approaching them. "You must be Davor. You look so much like Luka," And he did. They were about the same height and size and were obviously close in age. He had the same piercing blue-green eyes but his hair was a bit lighter than Luka's and his complexion was darker. He even sounded like Luka, except of course, that his accent was more pronounced.  
  
"Samantha, this is my wife, Rahela,"  
  
"Please, call me Sam and it's very nice to meet you both ... though ...I wish it was under better circumstances,"  
  
"Yes, so do we. May we see him now?" asked Rahela.  
  
Sam led them to Luka's bedside. Rahela let out a small gasp and reached out and touched Luka's hand while the other firmly held her husband's.  
  
"So, his brain ... is it?" asked Davor.  
  
"Yes, there is still brain activity he's in a coma but there is a lot of neuro activity,"  
  
They mumbled to each other in Croatian and then Rahela spoke, "He's been like this, how long?"  
  
"A week. Luka was hit directly by a pick up truck and he his injuries were ... _are_ ... very severe. He lost a lot of blood and went into shock at the scene of the accident. He was flown here and the doctors did have complications with him but they managed to save him, that night ... he's extremely weak and vulnerable and we're hoping he wakes up soon and regains his strength so that he can recover,"  
  
More chatting in Croatian and then Davor said, "We understand, Sam ... Thank you. Umm ... have the ah ... police?"  
  
"Yes, they have arrested the driver and he is in jail,"  
  
"He was drunk?" Rahela asked.  
  
"Yes and there is something you should know.," Sam couldn't believe she was hearing herself say the words, "Luka knew the driver,"  
  
"He did?" Davor was puzzled.  
  
"The truth is ... the driver was ... my ex-boyfriend. My son's father. He was trying to take my son away and Luka was helping us return to Chicago when Steve, the driver, hit Luka and Alex with his truck. I wanted to ... ah ... tell you this in person and not over the phone. I'm so very sorry,"  
  
The couple were stunned and stood silently for a moment, clutching each other. Then Davor sighed and walked towards the door then back again. He looked like he was trying to find the right words to say. He also looked angry. Rahela pulled up a chair beside Luka and took his hand and spoke softly to him in Croatian. She gently touched his cheek then said,  
  
"So _like_ your brother to protect whom he loves, ah, Davor? His one regret was not being able to protect Danijela and the children. And you know Davor ... you would have done the same thing for me," Rahela's words seemed to calm her husband and he turned to Sam and said,  
  
"I'm sorry if I seem angry. It's just that he is my younger brother. My only brother and he has been through so much already. It's hard for me to see him like this. I know this is not your fault and from what Luka says about you and your son, you make him very happy,"  
  
"He's spoken to you about me?"  
  
"Yes, quite fondly too and he loves your son," said Rahela.  
  
"How is ...Alex? Right?" asked Davor.  
  
"He's got a serious head injury but his surgery went well and he'll be fine. I have Luka the thank for saving his life,"  
  
"That's good news. All we can do now is pray Luka gets better so the three of you can be together again," said Rahela. 


	7. Little Boy Lost

**_Chapter 7 – Little Boy Lost  
_**  
  
It had been two and a half weeks since his surgery and Alex was able to move around with assistance. He had been moved from the ICU and was in the pediatric ward where he had made friends with some of the kids there. It was harder for Sam to be at both bedsides now, but she was glad that Alex had a distraction. But at night, when the other kids were asleep, Alex lay awake; too afraid to close his eyes; too afraid to relive the incident again. His erratic patterns of sleep concerned his doctors, and once a day he spoke with a child psychologist to help put his fears at bay and help him sort out his feelings about the incident.  
  
It would be a long road before Alex got a grip of his fear and learned to trust again. He knew his father attacked his mother with a knife. He remembered her crying as the knife slashed across her forearms. He knew Luka had been hurt. He remembered freezing in the truck's blinding headlights; the roar of the engine that grew louder as it approached them; the screech and the smell of the burning rubber tires and the hard shove that sent him into a stack of garbage cans. He remembered the pain in his head and the last sounds he heard. They were Luka's voice and his mother's - both screaming followed by a sickening crunching sound, a moan and a thud. The next thing he knew he was laying on a table beneath bright lights then he started throwing up.  
  
There were a few nights when he did sleep only to be awakened by the nightmare of his father running them over in the motel's parking lot. Mostly his mother was there to comfort him but sometimes it was the nurse on duty and sometimes he was alone. So Alex decided it was better to try and sleep in the daytime when the sleep was light and the dreams safe and at night he played with his game boy or wheeled himself about the ward.  
  
Sam was heading to Alex's bedside with a coffee when she found him in the hallway.  
  
"Still not sleeping, huh?"  
  
"Nope. I slept today. I'm okay,"  
  
"Bored?" Alex nodded. "Well, what would you like to do?"  
  
"Talk,"  
  
"Okay. About what?"  
  
"What happened to us,"  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
"Yes ... Do your arms still hurt?"  
  
"A little but I'm going to be fine. _And_ ... so are you!"  
  
"What about Luka? Is he going to be okay?"  
  
"I hope so," Sam felt the tears welling up in her eyes. She didn't want her son to see her crying but it was too late.  
  
"You're crying. He's not going to be alright is he?"  
  
"He's very sick, Alex,"  
  
"I'm not stupid mom, I know what happened to him. I know dad hit Luka with his truck. If it wasn't for me Luka wouldn't have gotten hurt. _It's my fault_!" Alex started to cry and his mother hugged him.  
  
"Alex, it's not your fault Luka's hurt. If it weren't for you ... if your dad didn't see you with Luka he would have killed him right there in the parking lot. When he saw you, he swerved and ... well ... you saved each other's lives,"  
  
"I remember Luka throwing me out of the way ... then I heard these noises but I don't remember anything after that,"  
  
"You banged your head pretty hard. But thanks to Luka, your dad didn't run you over. I will never be able to thank him enough for that,"  
  
"Me either ... Mom, why did dad hurt you?"  
  
"Your dad has problems and when he drinks or takes drugs. It makes him do some pretty terrible things,"  
  
"Does he hate you?"  
  
"I don't know,"  
  
"Does he hate me?"  
  
"No. I actually think that he loves you. When he showed up at the motel he wanted to take you with him. That's part of the reason he hurt me,"  
  
"Luka would never hurt you. He'd never hurt me. I hate dad! I never want to see him again! I hate him!"  
  
"I know Alex and you'll never have to see him again but I don't want you to hate him,"  
  
"I don't love him!"  
  
"That's fine, but don't hate him. That won't make you any better than he is and the bottom line is that he is your father and he's got a lot of problems but I'm going to make sure he never comes near us again,"  
  
"Mom, is Luka still in the room near where I was?" Sam said that he was. "He's still there because he's not getting better, is he?"  
  
"Well, he's not getting any worse and that's a good sign," Sam said, trying to reassure Alex as well as herself.

"His family still here?"

"Yeah. They're staying at his place now. They come everyday. Mostly in the morning,"

"They're really worried about him too, huh?" asked Alex.

"Yep ... But they're hopeful. I'm hopeful," said Sam.

"Do they look like Luka?"

"His brother, Davro looks like him a lot. He brought his wife and I've seen pictures of Luka's nieces and nephew. They look related,"  
  
"Can I see Luka, now? Please?"  
  
"It's really late and way past visiting hours, hon,"  
  
"Could you ask the nurse? Please mom, just try. I wanna see Luka. I promise, I'll be quiet and I won't touch anything. Please, mom,"

"Okay. Let me see what I can do,"  
  
Sam wheeled Alex to the ICU. It was dark and quiet except for the hissing of the ventilators and the beeping of the heart monitors. Sam spoke with the ICU nurse who said she would bend the rules for them.  
  
"Alex, Shelly said it's okay. We can see him now but you have to be very quiet, okay?"  
  
"I will," Sam pushed Alex to Luka's bedside. He was stunned to see the wires and tubes connected to Luka. He looked around at the lights on the cardiac monitor; turned to look at the rise and fall of the gauge on the respirator. Sam was a little concerned that Alex was getting overwhelmed but he had told her he was alright and he wanted to stay.  
  
"Is it okay if I touch his hand?" he asked his mother.  
  
"Sure,"  
  
Alex gently placed his hand on Luka's. Luka's fingers moved a little but he didn't open his eyes.  
  
"Has he woken up at all, mom?"  
  
"No hon, he hasn't but he's moved his fingers a little,"  
  
"Can he hear me if I talk to him?"  
  
"I think so. I've been talking to him all the time," she said.  
  
"He doesn't look so good. He's really white,"  
  
"Well, he lost a lot of blood when he got hurt and his body's working really hard so that he could get better. That's why he's so pale. When he's stronger, he'll look more like the Luka we know,"  
  
"Luka? I'm here Luka. It's me, Alex. They put a hole in my head. It's really gross ... all this stuff came out ...I couldn't see at first but now I can ... You gotta see my head ...when they move the bandages, so wake up okay? Please, wake up. You saved me Luka so you can't die. Don't die, Luka ... don't die," Both mother and son were in tears.


	8. In the Mind's Eye

_**Chapter 8 - In the Mind's Eye  
**_  
Luka could hear the rain against the window of the ICU. He loved the sound of rain when he was in bed. It made sleep inviting. But though he wanted to sleep everyone kept asking him to wake up. He tried but his eyelids were so heavy. And as he tried to emerge from the darkness there was a force; unbearable pain pulling him back under. He was confused. He felt drained and it was hard to move.

Abby was there sometimes. He could smell the faint smell of the strawberry lotion she always wore. Abby. How lucky he was to still be friends with her. He'd been such a jerk to her but though they were wrong romantically, they were solid as friends. Carter was there sometimes too. He felt him touch his shoulder every time he came by and Susan stopped by regularly. He recognized her low, husky voice and caught the scent of her hair which always smelled like apples. Then for some reason, he heard Davor and Rahela talking to him in Croatian. They sounded worried and they too kept trying to wake him. Were they visiting him or was he visiting them in Croatia? Was something wrong with their father?

Everything was a jumbled mess. He thought it was incredible how he could identify people without being able to see them. But why couldn't he see his friends? Why were Davor and Rahela there? Was he in Croatia? No, he couldn't be, because Susan and Abby and Carter and Sam were there. Was he blind? What happened? Everyone was in the same room with him but he could not move, or speak to them or touch them. Then he remembered. There was a lot of shouting and there was someone trying to hurt Sam and Alex with a knife. Then he couldn't see. The headlights were shining straight into his eyes. He could hear an engine roar towards him. Sam was screaming something and he tossed Alex as far as he could. But what happened then?  
  
He started to hear Sam again. She seemed to be there all the time. To his surprise, she was crying. He felt her tears on his arm and wanted to reach out to her and comfort her but he couldn't. It was warmer than usual and he was uncomfortable. He couldn't really feel anything but his muscles seemed stiff and he couldn't move. There was a lot of commotion in the room, suddenly. Why was Sam crying so much? Was he dead? No. He couldn't be. He kept hearing everyone in the room. Everyone except Alex. Where was Alex? Was Alex dead?  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------

Down in the ER lounge, Haleh, Susan and Abby were on break.  
  
"Haleh, how's Sam now?" asked Abby.  
  
"She's better. Lydia was on lunch break; thought it might be a good idea to take her along. It might do her good to eat something and have a change of scenery. Poor girl's been between those two rooms for days,"  
  
"Yeah, she's supposed to be staying with me and I think she's only been at my place maybe 3 times. She eats here, showers here and she sleeps in their rooms," said Abby.  
  
"What happened to upset her?" Susan asked.  
  
"Dr. Kovac had a set back," Haleh started.  
  
"Shit. What kind of set back?" Susan was concerned because Abby had "that look".  
  
"He developed a fever overnight and Dr. Anspaugh and Dr. Corday suspected infection and a while ago the fever spiked and was accompanied by a seizure,"  
  
"He didn't frigging need that now," Susan muttered, "Did they know what caused the infection?"  
  
"Was it the splenectomy?" asked Abby as she put the cup to her lips.  
  
"No, kidney infection," Haleh replied.  
  
"He came in with a laceration to the right kidney and the renal vein needed repairing. I'm not surprised. Elizabeth put him on a heavy dose of cipro and he seemed to be doing okay. I'm surprised this has happened now. So how is he?"  
  
"He's still in a coma, but now there's talk about septic shock," Haleh said sadly.  
  
"What? I've gotta go up there," said Abby.  
  
"I'm coming with you," said Susan.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------  
  
_Luka's Room – ICU  
_  
Abby grabbed onto Susan's arm as they approached Luka's room. The ICU nurse was speaking to Elizabeth while hanging a fresh bag of IV fluids and antibiotics. She glanced at them, rather sympathetically and left the room. Luka did not look well. He was deathly grey and Elizabeth seemed concerned.  
  
Susan spoke up, "Elizabeth may we? ..." Elizabeth nodded.  
  
"What's happened?" asked Abby. "He looks worse,"  
  
"He's got a nasty kidney and urinary tract infection. Fever's high at 105.6 and he's had a seizure. Fortunately ... he's still reactive even though he's still comatose so ... I've started empiric therapy using neutropenia and immunosuppressive drugs ... but ...I don't know if he's going to improve at this point,"  
  
Abby put her hand to her mouth and tried to stifle her tears while Susan tried to be strong for them both.  
  
"Well, he's still responsive so he's we can't give up on him yet, right?" asked Susan.  
  
"Yes, he is. But Susan, he's so weak ... I'm not sure he could fight off the infection ... even with the drugs,"  
  
"How's Sam taking this?" asked Abby.  
  
"Very badly, I'm afraid. She blames herself for this. I really don't know what to say to her; but she needs to get some rest and pull herself together for Alex ... even if we lose Luka. Alex is improving but he's not out of the woods yet. She needs to take care of herself so that she can take care of her son,"  
  
"And the family?" Abby asked motioning to the couple sitting at Luka's side.  
  
"They understand how grave the situation is. I think they are hopeful but I think they are also preparing themselves in case he doesn't survive," Elizabeth was blinking back the tears now.  
  
"His heart rate is still steady?" Elizabeth nodded to Susan's question. "How long do you think before we see if the drugs take effect?"  
  
"I'm hoping the therapy takes effect by this evening. I'm not being the pessimist here, Susan. I'd like him to regain consciousness too, but it doesn't look promising,"  
  
"I know," replied Susan, "but I also know that Luka is very strong and very tough and I don't know ... I think aggressive therapy and encouragement is the key to getting him through this. Elizabeth, I lost Mark too. I'm not ready to lose another friend. I'm holding on to my hope. Luka's not going to die,"  
  
Stunned by her comment, Abby and Elizabeth watched as Susan hurried out of the ICU. She didn't want anyone, especially his family, to see her cry.


	9. Dreaming, Floating, Drifting Away

**_Chapter 9 - Dreaming, Floating, Drifting Away._**  
  
It was 8:30 at night and Sam was in the hallway of the ICU talking to Carter, Abby and Susan. No one, not even the nurses on call in the unit, saw Alex enter Luka's room. When he asked his mom if he could visit Luka, she had told him that Luka had a seizure and he had gotten sicker and was not able to have visitors for a while. But Alex was determined to see him. In his mind, if he didn't go to him, Luka would die without him having a chance to say goodbye. He waited for the nurses in pediatrics to do their rounds before he sneaked into the elevator and went down to ICU, stealthily making his way to Luka.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------  
  
Luka never felt this exhausted. He was unaware of it but he'd been in a coma for two and a half weeks. His temperature dropped and he hadn't seized again. He was no better; he was no worse. He knew at one point, something had happened but he was not sure what exactly. His mind and body seemed to be drifting and he felt like he was floating aimlessly. He still did not know if Alex was okay and Sam was not there anymore. He thought he heard Davor and Rahela talking to him about the family at home. But he couldn't make out everything they were saying. Then there were more voices. Women's voices. One was Elizabeth's and the other, Abby's. Susan had been there too. Like with his brother and sister-in-law, everything they had said sounded muffled. He had tried to focus on what they had been saying but the sweet feeling of sleep kept taking him away. As he drifted along the darkness, he heard new voices; familiar ones that seemed to comfort him.  
  
"Daddy? Daddy! The boy is talking to you Daddy. Aren't you going to answer him?"  
  
It was Jasna, speaking in English, which was not possible. Besides, _she was dead_.  
  
"Luka, he wants you. He's trying to talk to you,"  
  
Okay, that was Danijela but again, in English? _She was dead also_.  
  
"I'm here," he tried to say.  
  
"That boy needs you daddy" Jasna said again.  
  
"Luka, he needs a father. Stay with them Luka. They need you," said Danijela.  
  
"Don't you need me?" he asked the voices.  
  
"We've always had you and we are waiting for you to be with us again. But not now,"  
  
"But I hear Marko calling me,"  
  
"That's not Marko. You need to stay where you are. You need to be with that little boy. He and his mother need a family. _You need a family_," Danijela said, in a comforting voice.  
  
"_You are my family_," Luka felt confused. He kept hearing "Dad" but it was not Jasna and it wasn't Marko.  
  
"We will always be your family. But while we wait for you here, you need a family on earth,"  
  
In his dream, he saw them smiling at him waving and he felt happy. He knew that he'd see them again someday but now he realized it had been Alex calling.  
  
"Luka, please wake up. Don't die. You saved me, so _you have to live_," cried Alex. "I need a dad, Luka. I want you to be my dad. _Please_ wake up and be my dad," Alex laid his head near Luka's hand on the bed. Luka reached for him with all his strength. He could feel Alex's soft hair with his fingers. It took every ounce of his energy, but he managed to stroke the bit of hair sticking out of the boy's bandages. Alex bolt upright.  
  
"Luka? Luka, you moved,"  
  
"_Alex is_ _alive_," Luka thought. He was relieved. He tried to open his eyes. He was so tired but he wanted ... needed to see Alex.  
  
"Holy crap! Mom, mom ... _MOM_!!!" Alex screamed, running over to his mother.

"Whoa, _Alex,_ what are you? ... What's going on? ... Hey .. Slow down," Sam said.  
  
"Luka's waking up! He ...he ... he touched my .. my head and he was trying to open his eyes! He's trying to open them!"  
  
They all rushed to Luka's bedside.  
  
"Luka? It's Carter. Come on, open your eyes. Come on! That's it. Come on back!"  
  
"Page Dr. Corday," Susan said to the nurse on call.  
  
"No need, I'm here. I was coming up to visit. Is he awake?"  
  
"He's getting there," said Carter with an encouraging tone to his voice.  
  
"Hey, Luka, we're all here and we want you to open your eyes. I know you're tired but it's time to wake up now," Sam urged as she stroked his arm.  
  
Luka blinked a few times and groaned a little then he raised his trembling arm to place his hand to Sam's cheek. He brushed his fingers along her teary cheek and opened his eyes. Carter sighed with relief and gave Abby a hug.  
  
Luka weakly motioned to Alex. He tried to put his arm around him, so Alex moved in closer.

"You did it. You heard me and you woke up,"  
  
Luka slowly nodded. He was glad to see that Sam and Alex were alright but waking up had delivered him into a world of pain he had never before experienced.  
  
Sam stood there and smiling at the sight of the two men she loved as they held each other. She bent over and kissed Luka's cheek and whispered "I love you,"  
  
"Okay, let me in here for a moment to have a look. Elizabeth checked his pupils, his blood pressure and Susan checked his pulse and temperature. All the readings had improved to everyone's relief. "I suppose you'd like that tube out now," said Elizabeth and Luka nodded.  
  
"Your vitals aren't the greatest but I think you can manage breathing on your own. It's been in for almost 3 weeks so you throat is going to be very sore. Now, how's the pain? Is it a 10?" she asked Luka and he nodded.  
  
"I'm sure it is. You my dear are very smashed up indeed. We'll give you something to manage your pain. Do you remember what happened?" Luka managed a slight nod then looked at Sam and reached for her. She looked strange almost guilty and he wanted sobadly to tell her how much he loved her and that it was none of what happened was her fault. Looking over at Elizabeth he pointed to the tube.  
  
"Yes, right ... let's get that out shall we?" Elizabeth called on the ICU nurse and briefed her on what needed to be done then she set out to inform Dr. Anspaugh and Dr. Dean and his family that Luka was conscious.


	10. Seems So Real

**_Chapter 10 – Seems So Real_**

**__**  
'Excruciating' still could not perfectly describe the pain Luka bore from his injuries. There were no words to convey how he felt. The simplest movement was torture. He found himself thinking about every action before he tried doing it. Lifting his head or his arm, shifting or pointing ... it was all too exhausting but he was out of the coma now and when he thought where he had come from, being conscious and experiencing pain was definitely a better state.  
  
The morning after he awoke, Davor and Rahela were with him. He could see how tired and frightened they had been and he hated having made them come so far and worry about him.  
  
"Luka, how are you feeling?" Rahela asked him, in Croatian, gently taking his hand.  
  
"Like I was hit by a truck," he replied slowly, with a smile.  
  
"Always the joker," said Davor. How many times do you plan to scare us half to death this year?"  
  
"What?" asked Luka.  
  
"First, we hear that you were brought back from the Congo half dead from Malaria; then you think about going again and just when we think you've come to your senses and you're safe, you get run over by a truck ... because of a woman,"  
  
"You know the story then?" asked Luka. He winced. There was no one area that hurt any more or any less than the other. It was difficult to talk; more difficult to breathe but he wanted to have this time with them.  
  
"Sam told us," said Rahela. "The poor girl. She feels responsible ..."  
  
"Not her fault. Steve, her ex ... he was trying to abduct Alex. Ow," He paused for a moment. "Has this ... routine of ... coming and going in their lives. This time ... I was in the picture. Guess ... I still have ... bad timing ... always in the wrong place at the wrong time,"  
  
"I don't know about that," Rahela smiled at him. It was the way she had smiled at him when he told her he was thinking of asking Danijela to marry him or any time he'd bought her something to surprise her. "I think you're in love ... again ... _finally_," They both laughed. "We always do what we have to do for love,"  
  
"I just hope she's worth it," grunted Davor.  
  
"As he gets older, your brother gets more cynical about romance,"  
  
"I am not," said Davor.  
  
"Well stop acting like a grumpy old man. You're not quite 40 yet," she said.  
  
Listening to them snip at each other made him laugh. It hurt like hell to laugh but seeing them made him happy. He always admired their love for each other. Davor would be lost without her ... very much like how he'd been lost for so long without Danijela.  
  
"You two haven't changed ... Still ... in love," He managed a smile but quickly a sharp stabbing pain coursed through his body, radiating from his leg all the way through his chest and arm. He gasped and clutched the bedrail. They looked panicked and Davor, came over and held Luka's hand while Rahela rang for the nurse.  
  
"It's ... okay ... it'll ... pass ..." He was gasping yet trying his best to mask how he felt because he didn't want to scare them but it was too late for that.  
  
"You don't have to be a hero, Luka. If it frigging hurts, it hurts! ... I know I'd be crying like a baby,"  
  
"You ... are a ... baby,"  
  
"Don't make me smack you, Luka," Davor smiled. The nurse came in and checked Luka's chart.  
  
"He's in a lot of pain. Can he have some medication now?" asked Rahela.  
  
"He's due for another dose in ten minutes anyway, so I can give him something now,"  
  
They were all (especially Luka) relieved. They didn't like seeing him suffer as much as he hated it. The pain seemed to be sucking all his energy and once the medication was pushed into his IV it would be mere minutes before he fell asleep. Luka didn't mind sleep but he did want to chat with his brother and sister-in-law. It had been so long since they had seen each other. Sure he called home frequently but he had so much he wanted to ask about things there; their father and his nieces and nephew but it seemed he could only stay awake briefly.  
  
"Davor, how ... how long can you ... and ...Rahela ... how long can you ... stay?" They were about to answer the question when the morphine took effect. Davor fixed the covers about his brother and touched his head softly.  
  
"We'll talk about that later, Luka. You get your rest,"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
"Alex! Alex wait! ... Luka! Stop him!" He looked up from the trunk of Sam's car and saw Alex bolting away from the motel towards the parking lot.  
  
"Alex! Hey, Alex!" he called. Then in what seemed to be slow motion he heard the engine and saw the headlights approaching. Alex was in the way. He had to get to him - get him out of the way. He ran hard towards the boy. He grabbed him and threw him to the side. He had to get out of the way himself but he couldn't: - there was no time. The initial blow was hard but somehow he didn't feel any pain. He felt and heard the crunch of the bones in his leg, and as he took flight, the pain revealed itself. He heard the sounds of the fence boards breaking as he crashed through them and the sound of the bones in his arm breaking as the thudded to the concrete. The sounds and the headlights kept replaying in his head. The truck kept hitting him over and over again. He couldn't get away. Couldn't make it stop. He wanted to know what happened to Alex? Where was Alex? Where was he? Where was he?  
  
"_ALEX! ... ALEX! ... Oh God! ... ALEX_!"  
  
"Luka, wake up! It's just a dream Luka," the woman's voice said. "Alex is safe and you're safe. It's all over now," Her voice was so gentle, so believable. He opened his eyes. There was Sam, beside him; hugging him, comforting him. Drenched in sweat and sore from thrashing about as he dreamed, he leaned his head back onto the damp pillow.  
  
"It's so ... real ... Sam. So ...God dammed .. real,"  
  
"I know. I have them too ... so does Alex. He really screwed us up, didn't he?"  
  
"We'll get through it. Can't ... believe I'm saying this ... but maybe ... we all need to see somebody ... or else ... we'll never ... sleep,"  
  
"I know. Alex is already seeing a child psychologist and it's going to be a while, but he's going to get past this. I suppose we need to do the same,"  
  
"Why don't you get a list ... of ... the specialists in psych ... tomorrow and ... maybe ...we ... could ... find somebody ... we both like ... maybe ... even ... see them ... together,"  
  
"Okay, I can do that. Now ... you're breathless. No more talking. You're also soaked and I imagine pretty uncomfortable," she said. "Pain's what? ... About an 8?"  
  
"It's up there, but ... it's bearable ... for now,"  
  
Sam checked his chart. "You can't get anything for a couple more hours anyway. Let me be a good nurse and get you a towel. Do you want to try a gown?"  
  
Luka shook his head. "Impossible to get ... over my arm ... anyway, the ribs, my arm ... shoulder ... hurts too much ... to move,"  
  
"So ... you're still ... 'commando' beneath the sheets, huh?"  
  
"_YES_ ... and I'm doubled up ... on the sheets there ... so ..."  
  
"_So_?"  
  
Sam Taggert, stay away from me. In ... too much ... pain," She leaned in and hugged him and started kissing him when Davor and Rahela walked in.  
  
"Davor, I think the patient is a lot better,"  
  
"Maybe he needs a hotel room instead of a hospital room?" Luka and Sam blushed and Sam giggled and went to fetch Luka a towel and a dry pillowcase leaving a red-faced Luka to deal with the embarrassment.


	11. Can't See Beyond The Moment

**_Chapter 11 - Can't See Beyond the Moment  
_**  
"Recovery relies on the patient's mental state. Desire, willpower and perseverance are key for recovery," Luka could hear the words from his med-school professor echo in his head, like it was yesterday. There were days when those were words to live by and then there were others when he had nothing left. No will, no confidence, no strength.  
  
After he emerged from the coma, he spent another week being closely observed because he spiked another fever and was being treated for pneumonia. One day he asked a nurse to hand him his chart before she left. He had not been keen on reading it and no one really asked him if he wanted to. He wondered if what was written there was so bad that everyone preferred if he didn't read it. No one was around, so slowly, he flipped the first page. As he read over the pages he could feel a lump rise in his throat. He was scared, shocked and he was worried that his fractures would threaten his career. He knew that if he was concerned, so too were, Anspaugh, Elizabeth and Dean. He felt a knot in his stomach as he continued to read about his internal injuries. He had surgery on his kidney and renal vein, he had a lung re- inflated, a hemorrhage repair in his small intestine, a repaired liver laceration and major surgery on his right leg and left arm. He froze when he saw that his heart stopped during surgery and he was in v-tach in the ER.  
  
He peered over the chart, very aware of his breathing. He tried to get a glimpse of his leg. It was in lightly bandaged while the external fixation pins in his leg did their job. They would have to be removed and the incision healed somewhat before casting but though it was elevated the sling made it impossible for him to have a look. He tried adjusting the bed but it was no use. He was fixed in the position he was in. He started to feel panicked. Sweat beaded on his brow and chest. He tried to move again but his ribs ached too much. Suddenly he felt pain stab throughout his body. "The meds must be wearing off," he thought. He just wanted to move out of the bed, out of the room; but it seemed sweltering and it was difficult to breathe. He tugged at and ripped out the nasal cannula and was even trying to get out of the bed.  
  
Susan and Lydia were giggling and chatting as they approached his room. Suddenly Lydia called out, "Dr. Kovac!" The two women rushed to his side which alerted the ICU nurse who was with another patient.  
  
"Luka! Luka, calm down. It's okay!" said Susan as she tried to stop him from thrashing about.  
  
"He's hyperventilating," she said.  
  
"He's burning up," said Lydia "Dr. Kovac, you've got to take slow deep breaths. Look at me," she said turning his face towards her to get eye contact. "Look at me ... Good ... Good. Okay, breathe slowly. Good, good," Lydia encouraged.  
  
Lydia, Susan and the ICU nurse settled him in the bed again. The nurse brought him some pain medication and Lydia gently dabbed his chest and brow. Glancing at Susan, she moved her eyes to the chart on the bed.  
  
"So, you've been reading," Susan began.  
  
Luka said nothing; only sulked and avoided her eyes.  
  
"Doctors truly make the worst patients," smiled Lydia. "There, comfortable?" she asked Luka nodded and said thanks. "Well, I certainly didn't expect to find you like this on my visit. Take it easy, okay?" Lydia squeezed his hand. "I've got to get back. No more reading!" she wagged a finger at Luka and he smiled like a kid caught with his hand in the candy jar.  
  
"_What's up, Luka_?" Susan asked. The look on her face and her tone of voice told him he had to answer her question.  
  
"I ... read ... what happened to me and ... I panicked. I don't know what's going to happen now. I don't even know if I'll be able to work again. Then what will I do? I just can't see past today!"  
  
"Well, let's start with you're not dead. You've just come out of a coma. That was the first step,"  
  
"But Susan, my leg's been shattered and my arm is broken in two places. I need my arm so that I can work!"  
  
"Luka, you're going to have to take things one at a time. You were lucky. Steve could have killed you. I nearly lost you in the ER and then Elizabeth nearly lost you in the OR. You've survived another huge blow. You're going to take a long time to heal but you will heal," Susan could see her words were beginning to have an impact on him. His faced looked more relaxed.  
  
"Look here. You probably didn't see the part where there is no known nerve damage to your arm. And look, about your leg ... Says here the femoral artery was in tact and there didn't seem to be a lot of serious muscle damage. The fact that you have a strong distal pulse is good and you can move your foot and your toes so the nerve damage is minimal. Stop reading! But if you must, try and read the good stuff too,"  
  
Luka looked out the window.  
  
"What?" asked Susan.  
  
"You're right. I'm lucky,"  
  
"Again Luka ... _what_? _Say what's on your mind_,"  
  
"Do you believe in ... that whole ... I don't know ... comatose state where patients say they hear and see things; people, places?" he asked  
  
"Yeah. Lots of patients say that's what brought them out of comas. Why?" asked Susan.  
  
"No reason,"he said, looking away again.  
  
"Did you experience something like that?" asked Susan. "It must be weird experiencing that as a doctor. It crosses a lot of lines ... scientific reasoning, religion ..."  
  
"I got permission to come back ... from my family. They were in my dream or something and they kept telling me that Sam and Alex needed me here. It was strange. I could hear all of you. Your voices were muffled but I recognized voices, Sam's touch, Alex's voice, smells ... (Humph,) I even knew when the nurses' shift changed because I could hear Haleh, Chuney and Lydia when they came to see me. It was funny, coming to think of it. They would adjust the sheets and check the IV and just question the ICU nurses' judgment every time they were here. It was a very strange state to be in. Anyway, I got permission to come back and now ... I don't know how I'm going to be a doctor, a husband or a father if I can't even walk. What if I don't heal properly? What good will I be to anyone?"  
  
"_Did I just hear you correctly_?" asked Susan looking very surprised. "Are you going to ask Sam to marry you?"  
  
"I was but I don't want her to get stuck with me if ..."  
  
"She's not going to be stuck with you!"  
  
"She will be if I can't walk or I can't work. She doesn't need any more problems! And I've had enough pity in my life, thank you,"  
  
"Can you look beyond yourself right now, Luka? Don't you see Sam and that kid adore you, no matter what? She went through hell when she thought you were going to die! Come on, don't be like this. You're badly hurt ... and yes, it's depressing and uncertain but you're loved ... _and_ wanted and you've got tons of support. You can't quit now!" Susan huffed and looked down at her watch. "I've gotta get back. Just remember what I said, okay? Hang in there," she kissed him on the cheek and turned to leave.  
  
"Easy for you to say," he said with a half grin "You're not the one getting stuck with me," He wanted to get her riled up again and it worked.  
  
"Ahhhh!" growled Susan as she left the room. She passed Sam on her way out.  
  
"Hey, what's up?" asked Sam, jovially.  
  
"That man of yours better be delirious from his fever. He's a stubborn mule who is very good at driving me mad!"  
  
Confused, Sam looked at Luka "What?"  
  
Luka smiled and reached his arm out to Sam and she came to his side and kissed him. Susan had a point. Sam wouldn't care about what unnerved him about his recovery. She and Alex loved him and that was all. Still, he couldn't see beyond this moment. He wanted to assume his role in their family and he was doubtful if he could do it the way he envisioned. 


	12. Recovery Is A Team Effort

_**Chapter 12 - Recovery is a team effort**_

The nurse had come into Luka just as Sam arrived. She pushed his morphine, checked his vitals and left them alone.

"So, what was that about with Susan, earlier?" asked Sam  
  
"You never mentioned what happened with Steve," Luka counteracted, trying to change the subject.  
  
"Ah, ah, ah! You first. I know what you're trying to do," she replied.  
  
"Okay. She and Lydia were coming to see me and they caught me freaking out because I read my chart,"  
  
"What do you mean freaking out?"  
  
"I guess ... I ... I panicked. I was already hot from the fever and I needed more pain meds and I read the details of all this and I had a panic attack," he said sounding rather ashamed.  
  
"So, Susan told you off," Sam guessed.  
  
"Yeah, you could say that. But I'm fine now and ... like she said, one day at a time, one step at a time. So ... was Steve caught?"  
  
"Yes and arrested for drunk driving, attempted kidnapping and attempted murder. He can't post bail so he's behind bars hopefully for good. The police took your statement right?"  
  
"Yeah. So what you're saying is that he can't hurt us anymore? I mean look at what he's done to us. I don't want him near us ever again. I don't want to worry that he's going to kidnap Alex or try to hurt you. I don't want him to ever have a second chance at harming this family!"  
  
Sam smiled.  
  
"What? Why are you smiling?"  
  
"Kovac, do you have something to say to me?"  
  
"Like what?"  
  
"Nothing. Never mind. You're sickeningly adorable you know that?"  
  
"How could I be both?" he asked, truly confused.  
  
"We have to work on your English in ways that matter. Now, I came to check on you. Hmm.... Lose the fever already, will you? It's hard to have visitors in ICU,"  
  
"I'll see what I can do. Sam? ... How bad is it?" He gestured towards his leg.  
  
"Well, it's not pretty but that's because there's still a lot of swelling. But, on the bright side by next week the pins will be out and you'll get it casted and then you can start your therapy," She stroked his hair and noticed how worried he looked.  
  
"Listen, it's gonna be okay. We're gonna get you through this. It's not going to be easy but it's not impossible, okay?"  
  
Luka nodded and tried his best to smile.  
  
"I'm really tired and I think the morphine is finally kicking in. See you later?"  
  
"You bet!" said Sam and she gave him a kiss on the forehead and left.  
  
He lied. He actually wasn't tired. In fact, his mind was racing. He knew what he wanted and for the first time in a long time he felt good about himself, good about friendship, good about God and good about love. But Steve just put a wrench in things and he had to change his plans. The pain ripping through his body was hard to bear and he worried how he'd make it through rehab. He knew the drugs worked but he knew how easy it could be to become dependant on them. He wanted to start his life with Sam and now it was all going to be delayed. He needed a plan. He needed to figure out a way to get through his recovery and start working again and start their lives together.

A different nurse came to his bedside to check on him.  
  
" Feeling a bit better, doctor?" she smiled. Sensing he was surprised to see her she said, "Shift change. It's noon,"  
  
"Oh ... yes, and thank you, I'm feeling a little better. Ah....Stephanie?" he asked, as he tilted his head to read her name badge.  
  
"Yes, Dr. Kovac,"  
  
"Can you do me a favor and page Dr. Carter and Dr. Weaver? It's not urgent but I need to speak with them,"  
  
"Certainly,"  
  
"Thanks,"  
  
'Support from family friends and for some, religion can make the impossible, possible,' "Now those are words I can live by," he thought aloud, as his mind drifted again to his med school days.  
  
"I can do this but it might take a team effort," he sighed.  
  
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later that afternoon, Kerry and John came to see Luka.  
  
"You look a hell of a lot better than you did last week," said Kerry, her tone blunt as usual, taking his hand. She grabbed his chart and checked his meds.  
  
"I'm finding that doctors can't just visit," he said to Carter, with a smile.  
  
"Everyone checks the chart before they chat with you!"  
  
"Well, considering you weren't even conscious when I saw you, you can wait for me to check to see if you're well enough for me to yell at you for getting into this mess!" Kerry teased. "You're doing well. Fever's down, pneumonia subsiding... so, what do you want?"  
  
"I want to know how long my benefits will carry me while I'm recuperating?" said Luka  
  
"Geeze, I give you two weeks off and you nearly get yourself killed the first day and now you're implying you need time to heal,"  
  
Kerry was always Kerry.  
  
"Are you done?" Luka asked.  
  
"Sure. I just had to get that in there. You will be paid as per usual because of the circumstances. It wasn't your fault you got run down by a maniac. Your benefits cover all your treatments and physical therapy and you're already insured for the emergency care and extended medical care and the bed,"  
  
"Good, I wanted to be sure. I have an agenda and I need to get back on my feet as fast as I can,"  
  
"What's the rush?" asked Carter.  
  
"Well, I'm not rushing but a lot has become really clear to me because of this and Africa and you know, I've wasted a lot of time. So now, I want to get my life with Sam and Alex on track and if you don't mind, I could use some help,"  
  
"Okay Mr. Epiphany, I'm in," said Kerry.  
  
"Me too," said Carter.  
  
Luka asked Kerry if it was okay for Sam to have her job back when Alex returned to school in three weeks. Kerry said that she would look past Sam's taking off and offer her her job back since they really needed the help and Sam was an excellent addition to the team.  
  
"Kerry, thanks ... for everything,"  
  
"Don't mention it. Just get well, okay?" she replied. "When are your brother and sister-in-law going home?"

"At the end of the week. Rahela wanted to stay on longer but I think they realize that I'm in good hands. They've got their jobs and their kids. They don't need to babysit me,"

"No, because Sam's going to do that," said Carter, grinning.  
  
Luka shook his head. "You do know it hurts when I laugh, right Carter?" Then glancing over to Kerry who was about to leave he asked, "Kerry, before you go, tell me ... how's it going with Henry's custody?"  
  
Kerry was touched that he asked. It was _so_ Luka to ask about the well being of everyone's family.  
  
"I'm not down yet!" she said then she turned, waved her arm high and went back to work.  
  
Carter pulled up a chair. "So ... What's really on your mind?"  
  
"Marriage," Luka said bluntly, looking John straight in the eye.  
  
"Whoa! When did you decide this?"  
  
"When Gillian was here, actually. I hated what happened then. When Sam wanted to take it slow because she wanted to protect Alex, I didn't see it that way. So ... in comes Gillian and all I wanted was Sam. I didn't want to go back to complicated relationships, sneaking, lying. I knew then I wanted to marry her and I started making plans and now I'm stuck here. So ... I need your help,"  
  
"What can I do?"  
  
"Well, for starters I need help with physical therapy and pain management if that's okay with you. I know it's not easy and I understand if it's too personal,"  
  
"No, I've been there and no one should ever have to be at risk for dependency on pain meds. I'll help you,"  
  
"I need a couple other things too," Luka seemed hesitant to ask "And again, given the breakup with Kem, if you don't want to ..."  
  
"Luka, I have to stay busy. You'll be helping me out if you let me help you. So ... tell me what you need,"  
  
"I need you to go to my place. The keys are in my locker since I have no idea where my car or my original keys are ... anyway, in the top drawer in my desk at home there are some blueprints for a house I am having renovated. I bought it when I patched things up with Sam. She and Alex have no idea I've done this and I want it kept a secret. I need you to make sure it's all going as planned and on schedule. I'll call the contractor to tell him who you are. The address is on the blueprints,"  
  
"I'm speechless. I didn't know you were doing this," Carter said with a grin.  
  
"It's long overdue. I had it all planned for the end of June and I think if I work hard enough, I can still do it. _Didn't foresee Steve trying to kill me_. And who knows how long I'm going to be stuck in here," Luka smirked.  
  
"Well, if you want to do it by next June, we're going to do it by next June. I'll be your eyes and your legs until you're able," said Carter patting him on the shoulder. "I'm off now, so I'm gonna get right on this. So physical therapy starts in 2 weeks?"  
  
Luka nodded.  
  
"I'll be there," assured Carter. "We'll get this done together,"


	13. Goodbye

_**Goodbye**_

The day before they left Chicago, Rahela and Davor spent most of the day with Luka. Though the pain was still ever present, he was medicated less frequently and therefore was less drowsy than he had been in the last two weeks. They chatted endlessly in Croatian about home and what was going on there. They talked about how busy the summer months were with tourists and how the open air theatre performances were still as popular as ever. They talked about sailing and soccer and of course Tata and the family. Yes, home was still home and though the world seemed to remember only the war, the people of Croatia, remembered it, rebuilt from it and recovered from it ... in his hometown on the coast at least. They spoke of Vukovar and how difficult times still were there. Vukovar was where Danijela and the children were killed and where they were buried. Vukovar was a source of pain more extreme than the pain he felt right now.

"So Rahela; am I going to find anything in my apartment when I go back there, or did you clean it all away?" asked Luka, laughing. His sister-in-law was even more meticulous than his wife had been and she was known for cleaning and re-arranging things so that they were never found by their owners.

"I didn't move anything. I just dusted. Your apartment was very dusty and I bought you better curtains,"

"I re-stocked your cupboards too. Do you ever cook Luka?" asked Davor.

"Sometimes I do. I wish I wasn't seeing you like this. I would have loved to show you around ... spend some time having fun with you instead of being confined to this bed,"

"Well just promise us the next time we're here you're not on death's door, okay?" Davor wasn't the most emotional person but he loved his family and he worried about Luka. He didn't want him to be lonely and though what happened to him with Steve was horrible, it was comforting to know that Luka had someone to love him whom he truly loved in return.

"Are you sure you don't want us to stay? Davor could go back and I could stay a bit longer. Or ... or maybe I could come back when they release you?"

"I'd love to have you both stay but you have your lives and I have a lot of people who will help me while I recover. Plus, I can still hire someone if I really need to. Sam and Alex will be with me at the apartment,"

"Oh ... so we really should get out of the way then," Davor gave it his best shot at being hurt but he could never keep a straight face.

"Promise us you'll stay in touch and that you'll visit as soon as you can," said Rahela.

"I promise,"

"Well, we'd better get back. There's still a bit of packing to do, ay, Davor?" She leaned in and kissed Luka on the cheek. "Take good care of yourself, okay and I think you'll make each other very happy so ... do it, okay?" Luka smiled. Rahela knew him well and like it was when he wanted to propose to Danijela, she just knew he wanted to marry Sam.

"You're psychic, you know that?"

"No, _you_ are an open book when it comes to love,"

"There are some around here who will disagree with you," he replied.

"Well, I don't know the American Luka but I do know '_our_' Luka and I know you love her. So ... you should marry her. Take your chance at happiness. We all want that for you, especially Tata. Now, we have to go. Get better, okay and call if you need us to come back. We love you. Remember that,"

"I will and I love you all too. Thanks for everything Rahela," Davor walked up and took his younger brother's hand and leaned in and gently hugged him.

"Well, as usual, she's said it all. We're leaving the keys with Sam like you said. Ah, Luka ... I can't lose you, okay ... so ...please ... no more trips to dangerous places or fights with I don't know ... crazy boyfriends. You have a lot to live for and a lot of people love you so ..."

"I'm going to take better care of myself, Davor. I'm in a better place now and all that happened in the past is in the past. I'll be fine. Thanks for coming,"

"Anytime you need me I'll be here. You know that," Davor said and Luka nodded.

"Bye Davor. Give Tata my love and as soon as I'm able I'll come home, I promise,"


	14. Healing

_**Healing**_

"Alex! Quit counting my stitches," Luka said as he lay for the second day in his new private room. It was good to be out of the ICU but still aggravating to be stuck in bed.  
  
"I would if there weren't so many! I'm up to a hundred and three! So gross ... but so cool!"  
  
"I'm glad I amuse you. Don't you have school?"  
  
"I have an appointment to see the brain wizard, Dr. Dimonte at 10,"  
  
"Alex, its five to ten,"  
  
"I've got lots of time,"  
  
Alex, go. I'll see you later and we'll play Rainbow Six but _please_ ... don't tell your mother okay?"  
  
"Sure dad, see ya later," Alex bolted out of the door. Luka smiled and shook his head.  
  
"Dad," he said, as the good feeling consumed him. When Alex visited one day, he had asked Luka if it was okay to call him 'Dad'. Luka and Sam discussed it and decided it would be alright.  
  
There was a knock on the door.  
  
"May we come in?" It was Deb and with her, Greg Pratt.  
  
"Hey, you're back from your trip! How was it?"  
  
"Well deserved after the scare _you_ gave me! _Don't ever come into the ER like that again, you hear me?_" Deb leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek and as all doctors did, picked up his chart and began reading.  
  
"Hey man how's it going? Here're your movies. Carter asked me to bring them up," Greg handed him a stack of DVD's.  
  
"Thanks. I'm bored out of my mind and when the pain kicks in these will be a good distraction," said Luka.  
  
"So, I totally get these titles," Pratt said waving one stack on one hand, "but what's with this one? I don't see you as a chick flick kind of guy,"  
  
"I'm watching this because I'm trying to figure out something Sam said to me a while ago,"  
  
"Whatever, man. Do what you have to do to figure her out, if you know what I'm saying'" Greg motioned to Deb.  
  
"I heard that," Deb replied. "Luka, you're getting the pins out tomorrow,"  
  
"Yep. Pins out and cast on and my favorite ... rehab!"  
  
"The quicker you get moving the faster you'll recover. You know that," said Greg.  
  
"Yeah. But it's so bad, you know. I'm just wondering if I'll even be able to stand on it in the next few months,"  
  
"You know what Luka? It'll be rough, but knowing you, you'll be walking sooner than you think," said Deb.  
  
"Deb, my leg was crushed ..."  
  
"Boo hoo, Luka. Worse has happened right?" she retaliated.  
  
"Yes ma'am,"  
  
"See what I have to put up with?"  
  
"So you're ... together again?" Luka asked, smiling. The two glanced at each other, smiled and nodded.  
  
"When we saw what happened with you and Sam and Alex, it ah ... it's made a lot of people think ... you know ... life's too unpredictable and short. We just want to be together, so ... why waste time on stupid stuff," she said.  
  
"It certainly changed me," Luka said. "Umm ... Deb, would you be able to help me with something ... say, in time for next June?"  
  
"Next June?"

"I need you to secretly find out Sam's dress size and find three wedding dresses she might like,"  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Luka's room in the early morning.  
  
It was 4:30 am. The day before, Luka had the pins removed from his leg and a cast put on. He tried to sleep but in spite of the pain medication and his extreme exhaustion, he could not. "If we could even imagine our patients pain and appreciate all that they go through, we would be great doctors – knowledgeable, appreciative. We would not be arrogant but skilled and most of all ... kind," Luka thought of his professor's words again and appreciated their new meaning. The pain made tears well up in his eyes. Suddenly, he was startled by a gentle hand wiping a tear on his cheek. It was his angel, Sam.  
  
"Hey, blue eyes, I thought you were asleep," she whispered and kissed him on the cheek.  
  
"Can't," he managed to say.  
  
"Pain's bad?" she asked.  
  
"Incredible, even with meds," he said.  
  
"I'm so sorry you have to go through this,"  
  
"Don't be. Done more good for me than bad,"  
  
"_What_? How on earth could this be good for you?"  
  
"I'm struggling but I've realized so much," he said, grimacing a bit. "I know now just how many friends I have; how lucky I am to be alive yet again, be given another chance ... and ... oh ... uh ... to have ... you and Alex ... ahhh!"  
  
Sam took his hand firmly. She looked at how courageously he bore his pain and thought of how long he bore the pain in his heart all these years. He was so up front with his feelings since the accident, she hoped they never had to go through that kind of hurt again.  
  
"Listen, I'm on for another three hours, and its quiet downstairs. They'll page me if I'm needed. I'm going to stay with you and I want you to try and relax and get some sleep. The meds will eventually kick in," She stroked his thick dark hair and smiled at him reassuringly as he shut his beautiful eyes. She was certainly attracted to his stunning features but Luka grabbed you with his soul and pulled you in. She was glad she allowed herself to let go of her hang ups and fears and be absorbed by his love.

"Oh, how was Alex's appointment?"

"The Doctor said he's healing well,"

"And the Cat scan?"

"Negative. No bleeding, no fluid, no swelling,"

"Good. Oh, what about his neuro test?"

"All fine. Now stop worrying about Alex and get some sleep," she said.  
  
"Sam," Luka whispered, his eyes still closed, "I watched Jerry McGuire,"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Later that week when Sam went to visit him, she found Luka, tired and edgy.  
  
"Hey, how's the patient?" asked Sam cheerily coming into the room with a tray. Luka did not respond. "I'm going to remove the stitches on your forehead," she said.  
  
"Can't the nurses here do that?"  
  
"Well I'm on break and I wanted to spend some time with you," she said cheerfully in spite of his mood. "Looking good here. Barely a scar," Looking down, she saw Luka gripping the sheets with his fist. His knuckles were white. Sam knew that she wasn't hurting him and then she remembered. Luka had his first day of therapy that morning.  
  
"How did physical therapy go today?" she asked  
  
"Please, I don't want to talk about it, okay?"  
  
"Well, maybe I could come with you the next time ..."  
  
"**_No_**!" he snapped, cutting her off. He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "Sorry. It's just that I'm trying to get my body to work again and it's not easy,"  
  
"Maybe I can help you?" she asked  
  
"_You can't**.** Not with PT. I want to do that alone, okay_?" Sensing he hurt her feelings he tried to sound more cheerful and changed the subject. "Let's not talk about me. I want to talk about something else. Tell me about you and Alex,"  
  
Sam obliged and saw that he tried to focus on what she was saying through the pain. By the time her break was over, the nurse came in and administered Luka his painkillers and he began to feel drowsy. Sam was glad he was going to have a few hours where he could escape the pain and have some much needed rest.  
  
Back in the ER, she spoke to Carter, Susan and Abby about Luka's mindset when she was with him. Carter explained that he felt the same way when he went through rehab and told her that the first day was the toughest. He assured her that it was normal and even a bit male. He also told her that Luka had the foresight to ask him for support during physical therapy which Carter wished he had done himself. Sam was feeling better after their chat and she and Carter went on to work on an incoming MVA.  
  
"Did John tell you what Luka's planning?" Abby asked Susan.  
  
"I heard from Deb that he's planning a wedding ... next June" said Susan.  
  
"Well that does it then. We're both on break and by the looks of it Deb's got some time before starting her shift so I think this is the prefect time for some girl talk," said Abby.  
  
"Yeah, but Sam can't hear a word of it, so we have to be very careful," warned Susan.  
  
The weeks wore on and Luka was becoming more mobile. The first two weeks were rough. He had no muscle strength, no energy. He had lost quite a bit of weight after the accident but as he continued therapy he felt like he was getting back to his old self. In fact in some ways he felt that he was going to be in better shape than he was before.  
  
Nine weeks after Steve had run him over; Luka was able to go home. Sam had shifts that worked around his therapy and she was very often able to drive him to the hospital and Carter, Greg or Chen would take him home. Being home was refreshing though it was often difficult for him to get around. One day Alex came home and found Luka on the kitchen floor trying to get a pot to make what was supposed to be lunch. Luka tried to get the pot at 12:30 and Alex came home at 3:00.  
  
"So did you just lay there?" asked Sam.  
  
"Yeah," replied Luka.  
  
"Why didn't you call?"  
  
"Because I could not get out of the position I found myself in to get to the phone. I just stayed there and I slept,"  
  
After that incident, Alex bought a little pouch so that Luka could carry around the portable phone and they also made sure he had his cell phone clipped onto his waistband, just in case the phone was out of reach again. Another time Sam found him swearing in Croatian trying to reach an itch on his leg. The chopstick he tried to use broke and he couldn't find anything long enough to get to it. Alex came to the rescue by cutting one of his Hot Wheels tracks in half and taping the sharp end.

As he slowly recovered, Luka and Alex became closer. Luka checked his homework, played video games with him, taught him Croatian while Alex fixed Luka's English from time to time. They had a very interesting way of doing the laundry and playing basketball at the same time and they played football in the living room and hockey with Luka's crutches, watched movies and very often Sam would come home and they would be asleep in front of the TV. On nights like those, Sam would feel grateful that Alex finally had the right father figure in his life.


	15. A House For Us

_**A house for us.**_

Luka was often found muttering in Croatian as he tried to deal with his pain. He was in his sixth month of physical therapy and the road was long and hard. His collarbone was healed and the cast removed from his left arm which was slowly regaining its strength. His leg was still in a cast and was still very painful but he never quit working on it. When he wasn't in the gym with the therapist, he was there on his own taking one painful step after another. If he was watching television he was doing exercises to strengthen his arm.  
  
The day he began to put weight more of his body weight on his leg, Carter stopped by to give him some news on the renovations. His own therapy rushed back to his mind, as he saw Luka, sweat pouring off him as he struggled to step on his right.  
  
"Ahhrghhh! Damnit!" followed by more expletives in Croatian.  
  
"Dr. Kovac, take a break and we can work on this tomorrow," urged Mary, his therapist.  
  
"No, I can do it! Let me just try once more," he quipped back at her.  
  
"Okay, but take it slowly," she insisted.  
  
More grunting. More growling. More incomprehensible swearing, but he took two steps on that leg. That prompted smiles form the therapist, Luka and Carter, who began to applaud.  
  
"Hey Mary," Carter greeted her.  
  
"Hey, Dr. Carter. You look great! Can't even tell you were in my torture chamber," she said smiling.  
  
"What can I say Mary. You're the best! How's our patient here?"  
  
"Well it's hard to say who growls the loudest between the two of you, or who swears more but he's quite the fighter. He'll be walking down the aisle by June," she said grinning. She praised Luka's efforts and headed home.  
  
Carter sat next to Luka who was still huffing and puffing and soaked from the workout.  
  
"Looks like you're coming along well,"  
  
"Yeah," huffed Luka. "But as you say here, in America ... it's a bitch!"  
  
"How's the pain?" asked Carter  
  
"Terrible," responded Luka.  
  
"Yep, I remember. What about the pain killers?"  
  
"At the end of the day it's tough. I can go most days without taking full doses but some nights when I'm just watching television or reading, there're these sharp piercing pains in my leg that just get the better of me. It helps when Sam's there because she does a lot of massage and I get a lot of relief from that,"  
  
"I'll bet," said Carter with a strange expression that made both men laugh.  
  
"So, how's my house?"  
  
"Well, I'm off and I'm starving so why don't I tell you all about it over dinner?"  
  
"Okay. Just give me a few minutes to get cleaned up," replied Luka.  
  
They went to what Carter called a 'roomy' restaurant. He told Luka that after he was stabbed and was in a wheelchair, he made his "gamma's driver bring him here just so he could get through the aisles and fit at the table with ease. Luka appreciated the space and the meal.  
  
"So ... I'm going to take you to your house tonight!" said Carter as he put his lips to the frosty mug of beer.  
  
"How? I can't get in there," asked Luka.  
  
"Well, I had the scaffolding guys do me a favor,"  
  
"A paid favor no less," Luka replied "What have you paid for now?"  
  
"Umm," he said downing the rest of his beer "I had them put up temporary ramps so I can wheel your sorry ass in there,"  
  
"Again ...EXPENSIVE!" Luka smirked.  
  
"Again...I know somebody who knows somebody. Besides, the house is at this point where you need to see it and decide if it's up to your liking. And look who's talking expensive. That is an amazing house!"  
  
"Well it's no Carter mansion but yeah, it put me back a few," grinned Luka proudly. "You see, when I came to Chicago, I heard that there was this family, the Carter's, who had all these big companies and real estate and their stock was doing really well so I invested in them and well, Carter, you paid for my house," he chuckled.  
  
"Well I'm happy to have helped with such a great project. We should go see it now," said Carter as he motioned for the check. The waitress came over and Luka put his hand over the bill.  
  
"No, this is on me. Let me treat you for a change," he said.  
  
They arrived at the house and Carter eagerly wheeled Luka up the ramp and into the house. The lower floor was done and it was perfect. The living room, dining area and kitchen was all one open space now, like at Luka's loft, except that it was twice the size. The bay windows were put in and the kitchen bay window looked out onto deck and back lawn. Off to the left they were almost done with the study. The shelves were built into the wall and it was quite masculine. It looked like a doctor's study. There were three bathrooms and they were still under construction as were two of the three rooms upstairs. The master bedroom was magnificent. It looked onto the driveway. It had a wonderful window seat, tons of closet space, an ensuite bathroom with a tall man's tub and a shower stall. It was a bright room and was as he imagined except for one thing.  
  
"What about the door that connects to the nursery?" he asked Carter, as he eyed the blueprints. "You see right here?" he pointed it out to him.  
  
"Oh, they forgot about that but when I spoke to the foreman he assured me they're going to have that put in," Carter was smiling.  
  
"Did you say nursery? Isn't Alex a bit old to be in a nursery?" he teased.  
  
"No, we want him close at all times," Luka shot back with a smile. The smile turned into a blush. "A man can hope ... right?"  
  
"I don't think you'll have to hope. She's nuts about you and I can see you with your own kids with Sam," said Carter, giving him a friendly pat on the shoulder.  
  
"I want to adopt Alex, John. What do you think?"  
  
"I think they'd be honored. I'm happy for you man. You deserve happiness and I wish you guys just that for the rest of your lives,"  
  
"Everyone gets their chance ... seems like a got it twice,"  
  
"I hope I get another chance like you did. You're lucky," said Carter, brooding a little.  
  
"Well, I hear lots of people get together at weddings," he said while Carter chuckled at the comment. "Don't laugh. I'd like you to be my best man. All those women will get a good look at you. You never know!"  
  
"I'll have to see if what you say is true then when I am your best man next June," Carter accepted.  
  
Later that night, he glanced over at Sam sleeping in his bed and he smiled with satisfaction. The pieces of the puzzle that was his life were finally coming together.


	16. Be My Son

_**Be My Son**_

"You beat me again!" huffed Alex, as he touched the wall of the pool. Luka smiled.  
  
"What, you want me to let you win?" Luka said, splashing him.  
  
"Yeah!" said Alex splashing back.  
  
"Come here," said Luka and Alex ducked under the lane rope and jumped onto Luka's back. The two had several minutes of rough play.  
  
"You know, a few months ago I didn't even think I'd be able to wrestle with you like this again ... hell, I couldn't even swim faster than you," Luka said and he dumped Alex into the water.  
  
The kid emerged from the water and tackled his new "dad".  
  
"Dad, you're doing great. Looks like you're finally getting better!"  
  
"Yeah, I feel a lot better. Can I ask you something Alex?"  
  
"Sure,"  
  
"What do you think of me asking your mom to marry me?"  
  
Luka was worried. He couldn't read Alex's face for a while. Then he saw the excitement as the boy processed it all.  
  
"Well, what do you think?"

"_What do I think? Are you insane? _I'd love that and mom would love that too,"  
  
"I'm going to surprise her in June. So, can you keep a secret?"  
  
"This one I can keep for sure!"

"And would it be alright if I adopted you? I mean you could still keep your mom's name but you'll have mine too,"

"You want to be my dad? Like ... _officially_ ... so _everyone_ would know?"

"Ah, yeah, you could put it that way," Luka said, laughing. The innocence of children always awed him.

"I think that would be so cool. You're awesome, Dad,"

"Now remember, it's a secret,"

"I promise, I can keep it a secret," said Alex.  
  
"Okay, well start keeping it secret now. She's here," Luka nudged him.


	17. She's Home

_**She's Home**_

"ER, Samantha Taggert,"  
  
"Hey, it's me,"  
  
"Hey, you. What's up?"  
  
"Cindy called and asked if Alex could spend the night with them because it'll save her time in the morning. They want to get an early start to the Science Centre plus I think Austin wants him there this afternoon. Is that okay?"  
  
"Ah .. sure. I should talk to him before he goes, is he home?"  
  
"Just walked through the door. Hold on,"  
  
Sam chatted a little while with Alex and asked to speak to Luka again.  
  
"Make sure he's got his toothbrush and enough money for the two days and ..."  
  
"I've got it covered _AND_ I'll give him the talk. Don't worry. What time are you home again?"  
  
"Should be there by 7,"  
  
"Okay, see you then, love you,"  
  
"Love you too, bye," she said.  
  
"Sam's smiling that smile again," teased Chuney.  
  
"That man's _GOT_ you!" Haleh egged on.  
  
Sam just blushed and grabbed the next chart. It was a patient with hives. "Whatever," she thought, too happy to care.  
  
Back at Luka's apartment, Luka was helping Alex get his stuff together.  
  
"Toothbrush?"  
  
"Check,"  
  
"Pajamas?"  
  
"Check,"  
  
"Homework done?"  
  
"Uh huh, done at school and I just have one thing to read for history and I'll do that Sunday night,"  
  
"Leave the homework so I can check it, okay?"  
  
"Okay,"  
  
"Clean socks and underwear?" Luka waited for the response. He tried again. "Clean socks and underwear?"  
  
"Maybe?" Alex said with a strange look on his face showing him what he packed.  
  
"Okay, throw these out and help me downstairs. We're going to Freddy's,"  
  
"For underwear? It's a convenience store!" Alex protested.  
  
"You'll be surprised at what you can find at Freddy's. Come on,"  
  
Alex helped Luka to the store and not only did they get underwear and socks for Alex, Luka grabbed a couple movies and beer and some ingredients for dinner.  
  
"Are you and mom gonna do it while I'm gone?"  
  
"First, that is none of your business and second, look at me. I'm still Humpty Dumpty here. We're watching movies tonight,"  
  
"Yeah, right. Whatever you say, Dad," said Alex.  
  
Back at the apartment Luka put the stuff away and finished up getting Alex ready for his weekend out. Sharon and Evan arrived shortly after and Luka gave his "dad" talk.  
  
"I want you to listen to Cindy and Dave and make me a proud dad. No crazy stuff, no mischief, okay?" Alex nodded and promised he would be on his best behavior.  
  
"Here's some money and you know what mom always says,"  
  
"Keep the receipts in case it's dangerous or gross and has to be returned,"  
  
"Great! Have a great time and we'll see you on Sunday morning. Now, tackle! ... Arrrgh" they growled in unison "High five! Get out of here!"  
  
"Bye, Dad!" yelled Alex and he ran down the stairs with Austin and his mom.  
  
Luka watched them drive off and he waved. The greatest feeling of satisfaction had come over him and he started to hobble about the kitchen preparing dinner. He kept it simple. He grabbed the biggest wok he could find. Stir fry. He threw in the vegetables, the shrimp, put on the noodles and put a bottle of white wine in the fridge. One thing led to another and he found the candles and put them out and he set the table. His leg began to ache so he called down to Freddy's and had him deliver some flowers to him. He detached his leg brace and had a shower and shaved. Looking at himself in the mirror he ran his finger over the scar on his hairline. It could have been worse. He was beginning to feel like his old self lately. He was healing well. There were no more bruises; no more casts; no more bandages. Just the scars were left now and some pain but he was handling it well. He fingered the long large scar on his abdomen and he shuddered. Oh yes, there was still some fear too. Some nightmares; some concerns.  
  
He combed back his thick hair and put on a loose shirt and a pair of blue cargo pants. It was still a struggle getting dressed and he always ended up sitting still for ten minutes as he waited for the pain to wear off. He re-attached the brace and made his way to the kitchen. It was 6:50. She would be home soon. He heard her coming up the stairs. He set up his mp3's and lit the candles. He heard her turn the key in the door. She was home.


	18. Away From The Sun

_**Away from the sun**_

"Hi. What's all this?" Sam asked when she entered the apartment. She hung her coat and keys and stood before the table.  
  
"Dinner, movies and us alone on a Friday night," He stepped up and kissed her.  
  
"Ummm, and what was that?"  
  
"A welcome home," he whispered. "Here, let's eat and have some wine, talk about your day,"  
  
"You know what, I had a pretty ordinary day and I'd rather not talk too much tonight, if you know what I mean," She rose off her chair and kissed him on the neck and nibbled his ear.  
  
He liked it but he was also uncomfortable. Sex had not been easy since the accident and though they managed to be intimate a few times since he'd been home, he just wasn't physically able to make love to her the way he wanted to. It was awkward and though she did not mind, it bothered him. He was glad when she returned to her seat and finished the meal. There was some light chat and he rose to clear the table. Sam tried to help.  
  
"No, you sit, you've been on your feet all day and I need the practice,"  
  
"Okay. Great dinner by the way," she said, as she watched him walk to the kitchen sink. Watching him was one of her favorite things to do. He was so tall and moved so smoothly that even the limp didn't take that away. He looked great tonight. She could see his broad back through the shirt and from all the physical therapy and working out, his butt looked even better. He was getting stronger too. Luka gave 120% at therapy and worked out an extra 3 hours a week. He was determined to get his life back and she knew he wanted to go back to work as soon as possible.  
  
"_What_?" he asked. Suddenly her concentration was broken. He caught her checking him out.  
  
"_You know what_," she grinned. "Don't pretend you didn't know I was checking you out!"  
  
"I don't know why," he replied quietly, bowing his head and busying himself with the dishes.  
  
"What? _You know I like looking at you_. Are you thinking all that's changed since the accident?" Luka did not look at her nor did he reply.  
  
Sam moved over to him and led him out of the kitchen. She eased him onto the sofa and took her hand and lifted his chin so that his eyes would meet hers. She moved the hair away from his forehead and ran her finger along the scar there. Luka closed his eyes and tried to turn away.  
  
"Look at me Luka. Look at me," she said and he obliged her. "It doesn't bother me. I actually like this one."  
  
"I know," he replied, shyly.  
  
"Makes you look like a bad ass!" She teased and was glad when he managed to smiled.  
  
Then she traced his jaw line with her finger; traced down his neck and touched the little bump on his collarbone that was the only indication there had been an injury there. She kissed his collarbone and began unbuttoning his shirt. Running her fingers along his chest she eventually reached the long and now much narrower scar on his abdomen.  
  
"This one is healing nicely," she said and she gently kissed him there.  
  
"Doesn't turn you off?"  
  
"No. It reminds me of how thankful I am. This scar saved your life and every time I see it, I feel happy that you're still here with us," she said, with tears in her eyes.  
  
She moved his legs onto the sofa and removed his leg brace.  
  
"Sam, I'm sorry that ... you know ... that the sex has been so ....awkward ... lately,"  
  
"Luka, you were badly injured. What do you expect? It takes time and _I'm not complaining_," she said.  
  
"It's just that it's been ...."  
  
"Shh!" she held a finger to his lips as she slowly removed his pants. There it was. That long scar that ran from the top of his leg right down his thigh; on the outer side of his knee and right down the front of his leg to his ankle. It was long and just about a quarter of an inch wide. It too was healing well but the leg was still very painful and still swollen.  
  
"This one's ghastly," he whispered.  
  
"Shh! I think its kind of masculine ... and so what if it it is ghastly? ... Most of all this scar reminds me that you risked _everything_ to save my son and it also means that the best surgeons saved your leg, so that we could continue to do so much of the stuff we like to do together,"  
  
Luka just looked at her. She meant every word. She wasn't patronizing him. There she was, this beautiful angel; loving him with all his scars, all his past pain and troubles. _She just loved him_.  
  
"You need to undress me now," she instructed him, and he began.  
  
"I like this song. What is it?" Sam asked as she kissed him slowly making her way down his torso. Dragging her fingers lightly from his shoulders, down his arms she grasped his hands in hers.  
  
"It's 'Away from the Sun' ...Three Doors Down. Funny ... it reminds me of me ... that in spite of me ... I'm still here and ... ah ...I'm ... maybe ... still ...,"  
  
"Still loved? Course you are. _I love you_," said Sam. They never watched the movie.


	19. Fond Old Memories and New Beginnings

_**Fond Old Memories and New beginnings**_

Everything was set. For the first time in such a very long time did life, this day, seem flawless. The party was set for tonight at their new home. Carter came through in so many ways and his final touch was getting the best music and catering for the special night.  
  
Sam and Alex were at the hotel. They fell for the story, hook, line and sinker. He told them they were to spend three days in a hotel while he would oversee the movers as they took their stuff to a bigger loft two streets away. He smiled as he remembered the day he took them to the loft. They loved it and were excited to move there as it was getting a little crowded in their present surroundings. He knew if they loved that loft, they would "flip out" as Alex would say, over the house.

_It was perfect_. It had a large kitchen with an open concept on the main floor. There was a study for work, reading and homework and a big backyard with a trampoline just waiting to be bounced on. There was a beautiful garden and five trees on the property, one with a tire swing off its branch and there was a deck that looked out onto the backyard. There was an enclosed two car garage with a new car for Sam parked next to Luka's and the laundry was just off the kitchen so they would never have to trudge downstairs to a basement to do the wash. The basement housed a rec-room with a home theatre system and a playroom.  
  
The rooms upstairs were exquisite. The master bedroom was spacious with tons of closet space with a huge bathroom and the two other rooms had connecting doors to the master bedroom which lay between them. There were two bathrooms upstairs and Alex's room was the most unique. It was a boy's haven and it was in the attic. There was a skylight and a ladder that led up to a door that opened onto his very own patio. Because the ceiling was so high there was a rope swing in his bedroom too. Luka spent a lot of time fixing Alex's room because he wanted him to enjoy having all the things he always dreamed of having and it was his way of spoiling him just this once without Sam's disapproval.  
  
He smiled, satisfied with himself that he was able to give his family such a good home. He wished he could have done the same with Danijela and Marko and Jasna but he knew that when they were together they were happy. He packed up the last few things that were left straggling around the loft and piled them up near the front door for him and Carter to take to the truck. Then he found it. _That box_. Sitting in the corner of the closet. The box that he saw every day. The box he avoided. He pulled it out and sat on the floor. Resting on top of it were a few pictures of him with Abby, him with Carol and her twins and pictures from Africa, pictures of some of his non- hospital friends in Chicago. He smiled as he looked at them then putting them aside he took a deep breath and opened the box. His father sent them to him when he lived at the hotel. That was the last time he looked at them. Now he stared at them. There they were; the four of them in happier times. Pictures of his wedding day with Dani; pictures of Jasna the day she was born; her baptism; Christmas. There were pictures of Marko, his birth, baptism; pictures of him sleeping with his children.

_Sleeping_. They were forever sleeping in the arms of their mother now and he missed them terribly. He felt the sting of tears in his eyes and this time, he did not try to stop them. He let them flow.  
  
"So is this the last of... Luka? Hey, what's going on? You alright?"  
  
""Yeah," he sniffed wiping his teary face on his sleeve. "I just umm ... found ... this box. It's pictures of me with Dani and the kids. It's kind of strange, you know. I feel in some small way I'm betraying them ... but ah ... _I know_ ... they ah ... They would want me to move on, you know. They'd want me to be happy ...right?"  
  
Carter stood there listening to Luka's voice crack and watching the tears fall from his eyes. He never in a million years thought that he would see Luka Kovac cry. He didn't know what to do at first but then, he did what he'd want someone to do to him. He walked over and hugged his weeping friend.

"They would want you to be happy Luka. They would want you to live your life," He felt Luka pull away and he let him go.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to put you in an awkward position," Luka seemed embarrassed.

"There's nothing to be sorry for. I know I'd be feeling the same way if it were me," Carter watched Luka as he walked across the empty room towards the window. "You know, the one line I love from the movies that talks about moving on, is in Gladiator ... The one slave talks to Maximus about his family and says to him that he'll see them again in the next life; 'but not yet'. That spoke so much to me. I know I don't have my son but maybe one day in another time, I'll see him again. I have to believe that because it seems that I have to do so much more here before that happens but when it is finally my turn to go, I think that'll be my reward. Kinda silly but it helps to think of it that way,"  
  
"It's not silly. I hope that too. When I was in the coma I dreamt that this is what Danijela wants me to do and that I survived the accident and Africa and crashing my car and the war... all for this moment," Luka laughed a little.

"What?" asked Carter.

"What is it they say in English? Love hurts? No kidding. Getting Sam was painful! How many times have I nearly died? Four, five ... ten!" Both men laughed.

"What do you say we get this stuff in the truck and head over?" suggested Carter.

"I hope she says yes tonight,"  
  
"Oh, she'll say yes, Luka. She'll say yes," Carter said as he slapped his friend re-assuringly on the back. Luka took one last look at the loft where so much happened in 5 short years. He smiled turned the key in the lock and was ready to turn the key in the new chapter in the life of his new family.


	20. Mysterious Events

**_Mysterious Events_**

Susan, Abby, Deb and Sam were laughing heartily on the terrace of the coffee shop. It was a glorious day and the four women were totally relaxed. They had just come from a spa treatment and were on their way to have their hair and nails done. Sam was under the impression it was a girl's Saturday afternoon off.  
  
"Oh God, I haven't laughed like that in forever!" said Sam, wiping the tears from her eyes. "It's so crazy that we all have this afternoon off. I can't believe Kerry would be impressed by the schedule," Sam's comment made Susan laugh even more when Deb kicked her under the table. She and Abby knew that Susan was bursting to tell Sam about the party tonight and they were on the lookout to make sure that didn't happen.  
  
On the other side of town, Alex was with Dr. Pratt at the batting cages. Greg was having a hard time trying to explain why Luka wasn't there with them. Finally, after distracting him with root beer floats, he was stumped.  
  
"Okay, Alex, Luka is doing something very special at the loft for you and your mom and that's all I can say. If he knows I said that he'd kill me okay?"  
  
"Okay, I won't tell if you take me somewhere else,"  
  
"Where?" asked Greg suspiciously.  
  
"I want to go to the comic book store and maybe you'll find a comic book you'd like to buy me," Alex suggested.  
  
"_What_? **No**! I've gotta get you back to the hotel,"  
  
"I'll tell Luka you let on what he was doing,"  
  
"You are a little con artist. Fine ... but then it's back to the hotel!"  
  
While Greg was trying to survive Alex, Luka and Carter were doing last minute checks at the house. All was set. The food was there, the music was there, the bar was stocked and the lights were up in the back yard. The priest called and confirmed the time of the ceremony at St. Paul's.  
  
"So, in three hours, you'll be married,"

"Keeping my fingers crossed. I still can't believe we did all this. I couldn't have done this without your help, Carter. Thank you. You're a great friend,"

"It was my pleasure. I'm happy for you, man. You deserve this. Now ... We'd better get ready. Greg should be here with Alex pretty soon,"  
  
Carter and Luka were showered and dressed and greeted a very stunned Alex who came in with Greg who was happy to deliver him to someone else.  
  
"You lived!" laughed Luka, when he saw Greg's face. Greg just shook his head and went to get dressed.  
  
"Dad, where are we? Whose place is this? What's going on?"  
  
"All these questions. This is a friend's house and right now you have a very important party to go to so let's get you dressed in your tux,"  
  
"A tux? What's that?"  
  
"A fancy suit that you have to put on right now! All your questions will be answered later," Luka took Alex to the master bedroom and got him ready.  
  
After the hair and nails were done, the ladies had their makeup done too.  
  
"Well, guys, thanks for today. It was a great idea Deb. I'd better get back to the hotel see what the guys are up to. Maybe if Luka sees me all dressed up he think of a place for us to go to later,"  
  
"Well you're not going back to the hotel. They guys are fine," said Deb.  
  
"Yeah they are having some guy's night that includes Alex. Greg's idea so since all our men are together, we are going out," said Susan.  
  
"Oh look, there's the limo," Abby observed.  
  
"Limo? What the?" Sam began but she was hustled into the car and was on her way to Deb's house where the most beautiful evening gown awaited her along with that thing Deb promised to help Luka with over a year ago.  
  
"My God! You guys are really decked out! Why didn't you tell me we were going to be this dressed up? I don't have anything like that," said Sam, a little shocked.  
  
"Sure you do. Your dress is right here!" Susan pulled out a stunning red dress from Deb's closet and Abby threw the shoes at her. High, with sexy ankle straps.  
  
"I don't get this. What's going on?" asked Sam. She was a little overwhelmed by how quickly things were happening all of a sudden.  
  
"You are going to a party with us. So come on, get dressed so that we're not late," chimed in Deb.  
  
"I should call Alex. I haven't seen him all day,"  
  
"And I haven't seen Shannon. You need time to yourself. Besides, Alex is with Luka at Greg's guys only sports ... _thing_. He's fine!" said Susan.  
  
"Okay, I'll get dressed but where on earth are we going that we need to be this dressed up?"  
  
"Pretty close to heaven. Now, come on, get dressed already!" said Abby "You're not going to believe this place!"


	21. Be My Wife Be My Family

_**Be My Wife, Be My Family**_

Everyone had arrived and was waiting on Sam and the other women. Alex sat in his tuxedo playing with his Game Boy, patiently waiting to be told what was going on. The guests list was small and included just their closest friends and some of their colleagues from the hospital. Luka's father was there too – a last minute gesture from Carter. Josko Kovac was away with Luka's brother looking at orchards he was thinking of purchasing and was not able to attend. In light of that, Luka decided that it would be easier if he had Sam and Alex meet him after everything took place, however Carter, in true Carter fashion, tracked down the senior Kovac and arranged for Luka's ex-colleague and friend, Gordana, to accompany him to Chicago.  
At last, the limo arrived and the four women made their way to the house. Sam was in awe. The driveway was beautifully lit and the house was impressive. It was an older stone house in a part of Chicago she had never set foot. It was indeed majestic. To her surprise, she recognized several people as she made her way up the driveway to the front door. Pretty much every one of the nurses she worked with was there, all dressed to the nines; all with huge smiles on their faces.  
  
"Guys, what's going on?" she muttered to Deb, Susan and Abby.  
  
"Patience, Sam. You'll see," said Susan while the others just giggled. Sam said hello to everyone she knew from work and to the five friends, (all moms and dads from Alex's school) she had in the whole city. Her stomach tied in knots; she nearly fell over when Carter opened the door to reveal Luka, Alex and an older gentleman who very much looked like he would be Luka's father, standing in the hallway, all dressed handsomely in tuxedos.  
  
"What's going on?" she asked, in a barely audible voice.  
  
"That's what I'd like to know," grimaced Alex, fiddling with the Game Boy that Luka gently took away.  
  
"Come, sweetheart," he extended his hand to hers and she accepted. He led her to the living room filled with chairs where the guests had now gathered. All eyes were on Luka and Sam and she was speechless.  
  
"Please ... Everyone, make yourselves comfortable. I'm so glad you could make it this evening. I have a lot to be grateful for and I wanted to celebrate with our friends. First I'd like to welcome my father. I also want to thank my friend, John Carter. Thanks to Greg, Deb, Elizabeth, Kerry, Susan and Abby for helping me get well again and for their help in planning this evening," Luka paused for a bit then said, "I'm so grateful to be able to stand here, before you. I've learned a lot of lessons over the years and I've learned that I'm very good at wasting time. I've been given a lot of chances to change my life and I figured I'd better take this one before I don't get any others. I'm very lucky to be alive and I'm very lucky to have Sam and Alex in my life," Turning to Sam and Alex he opened his arms to them and they joined him.

"Luka, what's going on?" whispered Sam.  
  
"Sam ... Alex ...You make me happy and you make everything about my life now, feel right. I can't get down on my knee as I would have liked but I just wanted your permission to place this ring on your finger and ask you to marry me,"  
  
Sam was speechless at first then through the tears she whispered, "W-What? Luka ... Of course ... Yes ...Yes," She stretched out her trembling hand and he placed the engagement ring on her finger. It was a platinum band with ruby insets with a four carat diamond on a high mount. It was exquisite.  
  
"Now, Alex, your Mom has said yes, so I'd like to know if you would let me be your Dad?" Too overcome to speak, Alex nodded and hugged Luka tightly.  
  
"I can't believe this is happening ... to _me_. I love you so much. I can't wait to marry you,"  
  
"Well, that's good because Father McNally is expecting us in an hour at St. Paul's ... so if you're not too busy tonight, Would you like to get married?"  
  
"Right now? Luka ... I ... ah ...Well ... What the heck? It's all been pretty crazy so far so ... yes. Let's get married tonight!"

"Then you'd better come with us," said Deb "You have your choice of three dresses. They're up in your new room,"

"What? Did you just say my new room?"

"She did. This is our new home. Do you like it?

Like it? Luka ... I love it! Is it really? I mean ... it's ... _ours_?

"It's really ours,"he said, taking her in his arms and kissing her forehead.  
  
"I'm really glad she said 'yes'" he told everyone. "It would have been an expensive let-down,"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Everyone had gathered at St. Paul's for the ceremony.

Sam went with Susan, Abby and Deb with Luka admiring the glow on her face while he hugged his soon to be son. 

"Alex, why don't you go with them and wait for your mom? I think it would be great if you would take her by the arm and walk her down the aisle," Luka told him.

Alex smiled then he rushed into Luka and hugged him tight. He tried not to cry but he was too overwhelmed.  
  
"Hey, it's okay. I know I sprung a lot on you guys but I'm so glad I did. Are you happy Alex?" he asked him, stroking his hair.  
  
Alex pulled away and wiped his tears. "Thank you for making us a family,"  
  
"You're welcome. Now, let me see you," Luka straightened Alex's tie and adjusted his jacket. "Okay, there. You look fantastic. Now go wait for mom, then bring her to me,"

Alex ran to find his mother and while they waited, Carter pulled Luka aside.  
  
"I ah ... did a little snooping yesterday and I found something I thought would help you through the ceremony tonight," Carter produced two shrunken copies of two pictures dear to Luka. One was a picture of his late wife and children and the other a picture of him with Alex and Sam on their camping trip on Alex's birthday. Carter placed them in Luka's breast pocket.  
  
"Keep them close to your heart," he said.  
  
"Thank you," said Luka, his eyes glassing over a bit. "This means a lot,"

Abby appeared at the doors of the church, signifying they were ready to begin. Father McNally, Luka and Carter took their places and watched as Abby made her way towards them. They looked at each other then again at Abby and grinned. So much water under the bridge among the three of them but now everything was different and they were all good friends. Next was Susan, escorted by Luka's dad and then Deb and Greg. The music changed and everyone stood up and turned to see Sam on the arm of her son making her way towards her soon to be husband. She chose a champagne colored dress with a wide neckline and fitted to the hips with a flowing skirt. Her bouquet was made of the same lilies that decorated the gazebo. She was stunning. Fighting back tears she gazed into Luka's eyes as he did the same; both their hearts pounding in their chests.  
  
"Who gives this woman to be married to this man?" asked father McNally.

"I do," said Alex with a wide grin.  
  
"Take each other's hands and repeat after me,"  
  
The vows were simple and for a few moments they saw no one else but each other. All they could hear were each other's voices.  
  
"By the power invested in me and by the state of Illinois, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Luka, you may kiss your bride,"  
  
The kiss was short and sweet and they both reached out and hugged Alex. Then Father McNally spoke again.  
  
"Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce for the first time as a family, Samantha, Alex and Luka Kovac,"  
  
Everyone cheered, dabbed their eyes and wished them well. It was the most perfect sights, witnessing these three souls find each other, love and happiness.  
  
Luka and John invited everyone to the back to the house where, in the back yard were lanterns hanging from the trees and chairs and tables set on the lawn. There was a gazebo decorated with lights and lilies. This warm Chicago night was perfect for a back yard reception. There was dancing, good food, handshakes and congratulations and ooh's and ahh's over the rings and the house. The toasts were joyous and some were moving with Luka's father summed up the evening the best,  
  
"Luka, Samantha, Alex. I am proud and happy at this moment. I always wanted my son to find happiness again. I feared for a long time that you wouldn't and I am so happy that I was wrong. I think somewhere in heaven the angels came together and planned this day. God's blessings on all of you,"  
  
By 2 am everyone was gone and the little family had the place to themselves. They found Alex asleep in the den, his head on Luka's father's lap. Luka's dad was reading, unable to get adjusted to the time difference.  
  
"Hey buddy, wake up," said Luka. "The party's over. Do you want to see the house?"  
  
"Sure," yawned the little boy.  
  
Luka put him on his shoulders.  
  
"Should you be doing that?" Sam looked concerned.  
  
"Funny thing about the human body ... it heals!" he prodded her. Seeing 'the look" he got he backed down. "Hon, I'm fine," Sam said nothing but she was more at ease.  
  
"Tata, you coming?" asked Alex. Luka was pleasantly surprised to hear Alex refer to his dad as 'Tata'.  
  
"No Alex, you go with your mama and your dad, I want you to show me everything tomorrow,"  
  
Alex agreed and Luka started the tour. They covered the ground floor and went out to the back yard again, then around to the front to the garage.  
  
"So, everything that's in here can be changed if you don't like it. The décor, anything and everything,"  
  
"Are you kidding, I've never had stuff this great before. I love it all!" said Sam.  
  
"Oh, before I forget ... Alex, go push that button and open the garage door.  
  
When the door opened two vehicles were revealed. Luka's SUV and a red Accord.  
  
Reaching onto a shelf he took down some keys and gave them to Sam.  
  
"I know you don't like big cars. With this one, there's enough space for stuff without it being overwhelming,"  
  
"This is mine?"  
  
"You like it?"  
  
"I ... This ... This is _my _car?"  
  
"Yes. If you and I are on different shifts, you don't want to get stuck waiting for me and it's a long way if you had to take public transportation,"  
  
"Luka, you've given me so much ...and I didn't get anything for you ...I..."  
  
"You've given me back a missing part of me ... a life. I can never thank you enough for that. Now, do you like the car?"  
  
"I do. Thank you,"  
  
"Okay already, she likes the car. I want to see the rest of the place," Alex whined.  
  
They took him up to the second floor and showed him the rooms there.  
  
"Which room do you want?" asked Luka  
  
"Not the one next door to yours, that's for sure,"  
  
"Well, I don't know if I want your loud music on this floor anyway and you can't live in the rec room,"  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Because that is for everyone,"  
  
"We could move that gym stuff and I could sleep there,"  
  
"No, I don't want you to ... besides I have an even better idea,"  
  
Luka took them to the end of the hall and opened a door there that revealed some stairs.  
  
"Go on up," he urged Alex. Alex did and then they heard it.  
  
"Holy crap! Mom, mom, mom, you have to see this! I have an attic room with a balcony and a rope swing! Mom! A rope swing!"  
  
"Sam could not believe the effort that Luka put into the whole house much less for Alex's room. She decided that Alex needed to go to bed right at that moment so that she could thank Luka in their new room.  
  
With Alex snugly tucked into his new bed, Sam decided it was time to properly thank her husband. "_Husband_" she thought. It made her smile. Lying on the bed she watched him as he undressed. Luka never looked better. He looked great before the accident but with all the rehab and his mission to take better care of himself and become stronger and heal faster had him in the gym 14 hours a week and it really showed. Being tall, he wasn't bulky but very well defined and strong ... and man, could he keep a tan! She watched as he walked over to the closet. Who would have thought a year ago he'd even be alive, much less standing or walking. He only wore his leg brace if he was working out or playing some sport and unless you saw the scar on his leg or stared at him long enough as he walked you wouldn't know he was so badly injured. Looking him walk around the room she could see the tiny give in his step that indicated that there was still some healing to be done. It ached a little knowing how he got that and how hard he had to work to rehabilitate himself so well.  
  
"Mrs. Kovac, you are way too dressed," he said as he lay beside her.  
  
"You're still dressed, Dr. Kovac,"  
  
"I'm in my underwear .... Now as much as you look stunningly beautiful in this dress, I know you'd look even better out of it," he said, as he undid the buttons.  
  
"So we should have just gotten married in the nude,"  
  
"We'll renew our vows in the nude. How's that?"  
  
"Kinky. But wouldn't we be old?" she laughed and he rolled her onto him and pulled her hair away from her face.  
  
"Age is just a number ... God, I could stare at you forever,"  
  
"Ah ... _CLEARLY_, you can't. So, let's see what you're made of ..."  
  
The kiss turned into caressing with Luka making his way slowly and passionately about her body. He kissed and caressed her breasts, her tight belly her, thighs, her calves. He pleased her over and over again until she felt she had nothing more she could experience then he began again, watching every intense sensation, every pleasurable moment she had. As she took him in, all he could think about was that she was his and this night was real and the next day and for days to come she would wake beside him, love him, make decisions with him in their home, in this life.  
  
"I thought I had the best of you before, but tonight ... tonight was ... it was ... God, I can't even describe how I feel,"  
  
"Wait until we get to Nassau. I have a lot more to give you then. But right now, I'm going to sleep,"  
  
"Um hmm....wait... Nassau? What's in Nassau?"  
  
"Two hotel rooms, a beach and lots of activities for ten year olds who have newly wed parents,"  
  
"Luka, we're going to Nassau?"  
  
"Ummhmm...goodnight,"  
  
"When?"  
  
"In two weeks ... I want to install a better security system before we go ... Keep all the Steve's out ....Goodnight,"  
  
"What can I do to show you that you've totally made my life?" she asked stroking her fingers along his shoulder.  
  
"Stop talking ....sleep,"  
  
"No really ... I want to give you something,"  
  
"I need sleep ...."  
  
"No, seriously..."  
  
"Seriously? ... Sleep,"  
  
"How about we start working on filling up those two rooms next door?"  
  
"I'm too tired and I had a lot to drink at the party...they'd come out with gills,"  
  
"Not now .... Besides, I'm on the pill,"  
  
"Then give me your best shot in Nassau...but now, please give me the chance to sleep or I'll drive you back to the loft myself!"  
  
"Okay," she whispered. "Nassau then ..."


	22. After Nassau

**_After Nassau_**

"Which one was that?" Samantha asked. She looked at the clock. 6:30 am.  
  
"I think it's ...Oh God, I don't know anymore! There're three of them!" he said, with a sigh.  
  
"How did we end up with three again?" she asked.  
  
"Well, we went to Nassau and we did it ... _A LOT_ ... and I got you three times," he replied pushing his hips into hers.  
  
"Yeah, nice," she laughed. "I don't think you quite moved like that,"  
  
"These children have aged me. I move slower these days. Okay ... that's more than one crying now," he sighed again.  
  
"Well at least they like doing things together," said Sam.  
  
"And at least they are cute," Luka added, as he pushed open the door to the nursery. "They just don't sound very cute right now,"  
  
Sam picked up the chubbiest of the three, Daniel, the only boy, clocking in at 6.5 lbs while his sisters who were in their father's arms were 5 lbs each at birth.  
  
Stefanie and Giselle were Luka's princesses and Daniel and Alex his buddies. Giselle or 'GiGi', as Alex called her, was the quietest of the three and Stefi was the loudest who usually instigated the crying.  
  
"They don't smell so they must be hungry," he said.  
  
"Okay, I can nurse the girls if you set me up with the giant pillow and this morning Daniel can have the formula,"  
  
"Okay, kid, it's just us men now," He went into the mini fridge next to the change tables. He grabbed a bottle, stuck it in the microwave then sat in the rocking chair next to his wife and fed his son.  
  
"You guys need to be baptized soon," he said to them as they chugged their breakfast.  
  
"They need Godparents too," said Sam.  
  
"Well, Deb and Greg are confirmed for Daniel and Alex and Susan are Gigi's and we could ask John and Abby if they would be Stefanie's,"  
  
"Isn't that something how they ended up together after our wedding?"  
  
"Yeah, but I'm not surprised. They have a history," said Luka.  
  
"Now ... They _are_ going to be together right? I mean, if they break up it could be awkward,"  
  
"Anyone can break up, Sam. Anyway, they're engaged,"  
  
"_What_? When did this happen? Where was I? And how come you know and I don't?"  
  
"I found out at the hospital when you were induced with the kids," he said, casually.  
  
"And you didn't tell me until now?" she asked  
  
"You're always busy and it never came up," he said, knowing his cool tone was irritating her.  
  
"Whatever, Luka ... Is he done? I have to get these girls changed,"  
  
"Yeah, just about," He put Daniel upright and took Genia from her mother. Sam looked at how much tinier they looked in his arms against his bare chest. He felt her stare and looked at her.  
  
"Thank you for our children, Sam,"  
  
"I was only planning giving us a couple more and just one at a time. I certainly didn't expect three at once," she said, cuddling Steffi.  
  
"So you gave me four. The more the happier,"  
  
"Merrier, Luka. The more the merrier and just so you know, I think I'm done having kids,"  
  
"Okay. Four's plenty. You've given me two of each. You can stop,"  
  
"Gee, thanks. Here, sit on the floor for a minute with them. I need to change these sheets. Got em all?"  
  
"Uh huh,"  
  
Looking at them with him she began making their beds.  
  
"You know, I think I know why we got three at once,"  
  
"Why did we?"  
  
"Well, fourteen years ago, you lost your two girls and your boy. I'd like to think their spirits are alive in these guys,"  
  
He swallowed hard and looked at her, "I love you so much,"  
  
"I know," she said, crouching down and putting her arms around them all.  
  
"Okay! ... Moment's over," he said, with a grin "Whew,"  
  
"Yep. They eat together; they stink together,"  
  
"I think we're outnumbered here. What time is it?" he asked.  
  
"7:20. Think we could use an extra pair of hands?" she asked with a big 'evil' smile.  
  
"ALEX!" they yelled in stereo.  
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The End  
  
Hope you enjoyed it!  
  
And once more for the record, these are not my characters or my show. It's  
just a little outlet for fun. 


End file.
